Alias: N/A
Date/Time: September 1st, 6AM, 3PM, & 5PM*
Level: 3
Location: Home, School, and finally at work
Tag: Open
Morning went as usual for a typical family in Tatsumaki’s house. White and Tatsumaki got up early, White to prepare Black’s coffee, and Tatsumaki to prepare for school and what a better way to start a morning than with a bowl of one’s favorite cereal. The hero was seated at the round kitchen table with a big bowl of Lucky Gems cereal—a cereal that was more sugar than cereal. The cereal was pure marshmallow sugar gems so there was nothing
lucky about finding them!
“Maki honey, will you take the trash out before you go?” White asked.
Tatsumaki uttered a grunt, while he fed a spoonful of the gems into his mouth and read over the back of the cereal box. He was never good at the word puzzles. What was a BIBART supposed to be any way? He had never heard of such an animal, and people could keep it as a pet? His father wouldn’t have let him have a BIBART even if he asked. As he continued to read, his brows immediately crashed together at the mention of a Power Ring. Not just any Power Ring, it was a Power Ring of Phenomenal Cosmic Power (which made it stronger than any other plastic toy ring)! He brought the box closer, reading over the instructions on how to acquire it. The power ring would appear to the chosen kid who managed to eat enough of the Lucky Gem cereal.
“I could become the strongest hero in the world,” Tatsumaki muttered in awe.
White turned a pointed ear over her shoulder while she continued to clean last night’s dishes. “What was that dear?”
Smiling, Tatsumaki exclaimed, “I could become stronger than Mr. Gar with this ring!”
“Yes, dear, you can do whatever you want if you put your heart in it!” she giggled.
Tatsumaki rose from the kitchen table and walked over to the food cabinet, gazing at the walls upon walls of Lucky Gem cereal. Frowning in determination, he smirked.
We have more than enough cereal. The power ring has to appear! Grabbing a few boxes, Tatsumaki returned to the table and sat with the confidence of a grand master. He closed his eyes, resting his hands at his hips and inhaled a deep meditative breath. He then exhaled deeply. Opening his eyes, there was a fire in them as he grabbed his cereal bowl, raised it before his face and started chowing down. Bowl after bowl was devoured, box after box, until Black finally woke for work.
The shadow man stretched out his arms and yawned before he threw back the covers and rolled out of bed. Sliding on his fuzzy bear slippers, he shuffled over to his lounging robe and slipped it on (not like there was anything to see besides opaque blackness). Opening the bedroom door, he paused when a sea of boxes dumped into his bedroom. Peering down at the cereal boxes, he muttered in confusion, “What the…”
Wading through the pool of boxes, Black rubbed at his nonexistent eyes. He walked over to the food cabinet and opened it finding only cobwebs. Peering down at the cereal boxes that flooded the house, Black yelled irritably, “Honey!”
White turned her head, the boxes that were piled on top of her falling away to reveal her still at the sink cleaning. “Yes, my gorgeous husband?”
“Tatsumaki ate all the cereal!” he growled.
He then waded over to a pile where the refrigerator was supposed to be. Smacking the boxes aside, he opened the fridge and frowned at the missing milk. “He drank all the milk!”
Facing the kitchen, Black hollered, “I can’t find anything with these boxes everywhere. I’m gonna fix this!”
Black spread his robes like a flasher, and all the boxes were sucked into his abyssal body like into the mouth of a black hole. Once the house was clean of the cereal boxes, he gazed over at his passed out blob of a son.
“Honey, Tatsumaki has gotten fat! No son of mine is fat. This is all because of your coddling!”
“Tatsumaki is a growing boy!”
“I’m not even sure he’s my son anymore. Isn’t he supposed to be gray? I mean, White and Black when mixed together make gray and not…not
this!”
Tatsumaki’s eyes cracked open. He had passed out. Squinting up at the bright kitchen lamps, his body felt heavy and his heart was racing from the sugar overload. Failure…he failed. He wasn’t the chosen one. His thoughts depressed him. The ring never appeared to him. His stomach growled and a wave of gas entered his mouth, causing his cheeks to swell. A heavy belch erupted from the hero, flying from his throat to land between his moobs was a yellow plastic ring with a large purple P emblem. Tatsumaki’s eyes grew to the size of saucers upon seeing it. He picked up the ring between his index finger and thumb and held it before his eyes.
“I…I did it! I’m the chosen one! The Power Ring chose me!” he exclaimed.
Black walked over to Tatsumaki, sipped his cup of coffee and sighed in exasperation, “That’s a plastic toy ring, son…don’t tell me you ate all of those boxes just to get it.”
White whirled around and frowned at her husband. “No, Black! It’s the
POWER RING! The ring that will grant one…the uh…um…power of the universe!”
“Don’t encourage him! See? You always do this and this is why he’s…” Black glanced back at Tatsumaki, biting back the word he wanted to say to describe him but he didn’t want to be a bad father. “…he’s the way he is. He doesn’t get it from me! He doesn’t get it from anyone. Where does this come from? Are you sure he’s…”
White crossed her arms beneath her breasts and glared at her husband. “Am I sure what, Black?” She already had an idea of what he was trying to say.
“Well, when you and I…we uh…are you
sure? I mean…was there possiblee~someone else?”
“Black, how could you? That’s so awful!”
“What? I was just asking. He should be Gray right? Because Black and White makes Gray!”
Tatsumaki was trying to slide the ring on his finger, but his fingers were too fat for it. He stared at the ring in panic. NO; he wouldn’t be able to properly wield its power. White saw her son struggling and removed the necklace from about her neck. She crouched next to him and took the ring from him. Sliding it through the hole, she hooked her necklace about Tatsumaki’s neck and gave his cheek a kiss.
“There baby it’s the same thing as wearing it,” she stated.
Tatsumaki peered down at the ring and grinned in excitement. With a grunt, he sat up and curled his arms, flexing his puffy arms.
“I can feel it! The power coursing through me!”
Black just stared at his son for a silent moment and then walked off back to the bedroom. “I’m gonna get ready for work.”
Karate Club
Ten students were seated on their knees in white gis before their chubby master who was seated similarly on a pillow facing them. Kevin was gawking at how Tatsumaki had suddenly let himself go. Had it happened overnight? Did Mr. Poe make a fat-o-ray or something? His students were muttering among themselves in confusion.
“Sensei’s gotten bigger…”
“Is he on a new diet?”
“What? He didn’t tell us!”
Kevin scowled—the other students were so stupid. “He’s fat, you fools! He’s lost his touch!”
“Shut up Kevin! Sensei is the best!”
One of the students raced over to drop to his knees before Tatsumaki in a low bow. He pleaded, “Sensei, we are impressed by your power! Please, teach us how we can become strong like you too!”
Kevin stood and held his hand out in Tatsumaki’s direction. “For god’s sake people, he is fat! Chubby! Morbidly obese! Rotund! Horizontally challenged! You want to get like that then go to McGronals and devour some Mega Macs! I’m sure that’s what he did!”
“Shut it Kevin!”
“Sensei, Kevin has always lacked faith in you, but we-”
The student heard a low snoring sound and glanced up at Tatsumaki to see him hunched over sleeping like a baby. His chin was resting comfortably against his chest and his round belly was keeping him from dumping over on his face. A stream of drool was rolling down his chest from his mouth. The run to school that morning had used up all his sugar rush and he was no longer feeling the high. The bus driver had been too impressed by his power to let him on (it was actually more like he didn’t want his brand new wheels to go out).
“Sensei is meditating…”
“WHAT? He’s freakin’ asleep!” Kevin clapped his palm against his forehead in a loud face-palm. “Enough of this nonsense. It’s about time the real master of this club steps forth!”
Kevin walked over to Tatsumaki and pivoted on the ball of his right foot. With a cry, he twisted his body, swinging his right foot around in a roundhouse kick meant for Tatsumaki’s face. Suddenly, Tatsumaki’s right forearm rose, blocking Kevin’s kick. Kevin’s face paled and quickly he stepped back in fright. Silence fell over the room as the students gawked.
Zzzz…
“Ah! Sensei blocked your kick in his sleep!” the student exclaimed.
Several of the students gasped in awe.
“WHAT? Are you serious?” Kevin snarled. He walked over and simply rested his hands on Tatsumaki’s shoulders and pushed him over off the master’s pillow. Kevin then sat on the pillow, easing back his head as a diabolical laugh bubbled from him.
The students gasped in shock.
“No; Kevin can’t be our master! Quick, someone wake sensei from his meditation!”
“HE’S ASLEEP!” Kevin yelled.
One of the students raced over to Tatsumaki and shook him. “Sensei! Kevin is trying to steal your position!”
Tatsumaki’s eyes groggily opened and he dragged the back of his hand across his mouth to gather up the drool. With the student’s help, he sat up and gazed over at Kevin who was seated comfortably on such a sacred pillow. His eyes widened in shock. Kevin grinned over at him as he rubbed his tush into it.
“What’s the matter Tatsu? A
true master is sitting on this pillow now,” Kevin declared with a wicked smirk.
“A true master, huh?” said Tatsumaki as he rose to his feet. “A true master would fight me for it. Fight me Kevin, prove to me that you deserve to sit there.”
Kevin narrowed his eyes at Tatsumaki in disbelief before he burst with laughter. The fighter rolled about on the pillow, holding his sides and kicking his feet. “Fight you? I’d be surprised if you could even throw a kick!”
Tatsumaki confidently smirked. “You
should be afraid, Kevin for I am the possessor of the Power Ring.”
He flicked the ring about his tire-neck. The students rushed over to gawk at the ring. Kevin sat up and arched a brow.
“You mean that plastic ring that comes randomly inside a Lucky Gems cereal box?”
A female student fell weakly to her knees, her hands posting out to catch herself. “I…I feel it’s power! I…I’m too weak. It’s power is too great!”
She then fainted.
“Oh no! Karen! She was overwhelmed by the ring’s power!”
“KAREN IS NARCOLEPTIC! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? WHY DO I EVEN COME TO THIS CLUB?” Kevin screamed.
“That’s not how you talk to a lady,” Tatsumaki growled.
“WHAT?” Kevin swore he was about to get an aneurysm.
“Come Kevin, we fight now. I will avenge Karen’s honor.”
Kevin shook his head and stood. “Whatever. I’ll fight you. Somebody has to beat you and turn this club back into what it was meant to be and not this club of numbskulls!”
Kevin struck a pose. His right arm was bent with his right hand, palm up toward the ceiling. His left arm was extended diagonally toward the floor with the palm of his left hand down. His right foot was forward and left to the side with his knees slightly bent for spring. Behind his glasses was a stern and determined scowl. He was going to show them how much of an idiot Tatsumaki was.
The Karate students fled away from the two fighters giving them space. Tatsumaki was glaring across the distance at Kevin, and Kevin noticed that he wasn’t even using a stance.
What sort of trick does he have up his sleeve? Kevin mused.
Wait…what? Tatsumaki is an idiot. What am I nervous about?Kevin broke into a sprint toward Tatsumaki and when he was a few feet away, he sprang into the air and extended his foot into a flying kick.
“HA!” he cried. His foot connected with Tatsumaki’s gut feeling the warm, malleable flesh give against the sole of his foot, swallowing it up before it sent a painful shock through his leg. Tatsumaki had bent over slightly to absorb the kick and thrusting out his hips, his belly repelled the other fighter. Kevin gasped as he went flying backwards.
“Now to finish you off,” Tatsumaki declared. Tatsumaki stepped, bent at the knees, and sprang into the air TATSUMAKIKJHKDJGKJH (nobody ever understood what he said in the arcade and not now either). The kick hadn’t been as graceful. The shift in his weight, threw off his balance, sending the fat boy flipping haphazardly through the air. Kevin’s face paled when it looked like a massive boulder was hurtling toward him. Tatsumaki’s ass met Kevin’s face.
“NOOO!” Kevin shrieked as he felt the weight of his opponent crashing down on him. His back struck the wooden floor and Tatsumaki’s weight bore down on him, crushing the very soul out of him. The floor shattered from the impact, dropping the two six inches deep as a green ring of flatulence expanded outwards like the aftershock of a nuke. The fall had been great enough to also knock Tatsumaki out. Kevin’s soul had popped out of his mouth from his body being flattened and his mouth foamed over from the stench of having been farted on.
The karate students jumped and cheered in praise.
“Sensei has never showed us this technique before!”
“I don’t think I’m big enough to be able to pull it off. I need to go eat some mega macs!”
“Hey guys, let’s go to McGronals and get big like sensei!”
“YEAH!”
The karate students left the dojo, cutting out the lights. It wasn’t until an hour later that Tatsumaki’s cell phone started to ring
You’re the best! A-rou~nd! No one’s gonna ever keep you down! Tatsumaki groaned and reached a hand into his pants pocket to remove his cell phone. Raising the cell phone to his ear, he muttered, “Ah..”
“Am I going to have a late worker today?” Mr. Gar’s voice ominously passed through the phone.
Tatsumaki immediately sat up-right in a frightful start. He glanced at the time and his face paled. Oh shit, he only had fifteen minutes.
“I’m-I'm on my way!” he exclaimed.
“You better get here. Don’t make me hafta’ find you!”
Mr. Gar hung up and Tatsumaki rose to his feet, swatting a few splinters off his bottom.
“Power Ring grant me speed!” he commanded the ring, and believing it had granted his wish, he started running.
Mr. Gar’s Hero Supply & Bodega
Mr. Gar’s voice squealed over the intercom. “So I’ve been receivin’ complaints about a road block, blocking the entrance to my store…TATSUMAKI! Get your big fat butt out of the way!”
The fighter had passed out in the entrance and had been laying there ever since. He had made it on time. Thanks to the Power Ring. If it hadn’t been for the plastic toy, then he would have never made it on time.
“Hai…” Tatsumaki replied and sluggishly crawled into the store and over into a corner where he could finish dying in.
