[OOC] The War of the Three: Exodus

[Gardevoiran]

Apia's Return

"Isn't it a fine day to swarm and crush?"

---

Name: Apia von Wingstar

Title/Epiphet: Hivemother, Buzzing Swarm, Heavenly Traitor, Mom

Allegiance/Faction: Hell

Race: Vampiric Queen Bee / Ascended Human

Age: Pretty Damn Old

Gender: Female (for the most part)

Height: 5'0"

Weight: Yes.

Backstory:
Not much is really known about the Queen in terms of her history prior, as the main extent was that she showed up in the Nexus one day and... asserted herself. What is known about her is that she's spent her last couple of centuries in retirement, trying to construct her own home within the confines of Hell. She tried to fight for the Heavens once, but was hastily casted out when one of her drones stung Deva's face. It was seen as an act of aggression on her part, and she 'retreated' to the confines of Hell as a suitable place to set up her home and domain.

In actuality, while everyone in Hell was fighting in Arcadia and such, she was being handled by Ira in multiple senses of the word..

Before all of that, though. As time passed, she began to become more and more tired of the same process every day. Building her home up was becoming repetitive, especially when you were only building it out of the same materials. She craved variety in her home, and there was one good way to get that variety. Coming out of her retirement to hunt for lands and new materials to construct her home out of. It was a risky idea, but then she remembered that there wasn't much penalty for dying in the Nexus, so she was ready to take on the world! Her home would be the finest in all of Hell- no, THE ENTIRE NEXUS!

Then Dana got involved and Apia became a vampire.

For the last bit of events within the Nexus, Apia has been doing a number of things. She's firstly and foremostly been working on her supply of vampiric bees, trying to turn them into ruthless and massive killing machines capable of actually hurting enemies, and she's also been trying to satiate her bloodlust as a new vampire. Needless to say, both have been going on swell for Apia, but not the residents of the dungeons of Hell.

Powers:
Queenly Majesty - Being the Queen Bee, Apia has distinct control over any bees or the like, often times turning them into her own minions and swarming her opponents with waves upon waves of pure torment and buzzy terror.
- Defend Formation - Apia directs her minions to a defensive form, maximizing the amount of damage lessened at the sacrifice of her own strength and mobility.
- Attack Formation Alpha - Apia directs her minions to swarm something or someone and accumulate a steady amount of damage onto the enemy, acting like a sort of poison (and as DPS). Alpha also has a slight edge over Beta, as it causes the target to become paralyzed in the main area of affliction (arms, legs, torso, etc. Combinations are possible).
- Attack Formation Beta - Similarly to Alpha, Beta is a direction of a swarm to encompass something/someone, but instead of doing steady damage, it does instantaneous damage. The damage output is ridiculous, but the cost of it is greater, ending up with hordes of dead bees and wasps afterwards. It's slightly unnerving for Apia to witness these bee dying.
Stinger Regrowth - Apia, unlike most other bees, does not die when her stinger is lost. It instead is regenerated through some form or another, and she is able to continue life like nothing happened.
Pollination - As a bee, Apia has grown accustomed to the many different varieties of pollen brought to her hive, and as such, she has grown into a resistance of it. Any adverse effects of pollen spread on a battlefield will not affect her (unless it is in very high concentrations or in major abundance).
Flight - She can fly using her tiny insect wings... or is it magic? Bees are too heavy to fly...
Newborn Vampirism - Bloodlust, blood drinking, you know the drill. Apia's trying to get a hold of it, spending a few hours every day simply in the dungeons of hell eating mooks and such, with the occasional actual-demon, but the dungeons can satisfy her for the time being, except on special occasions.
Portal Manipulation - Apia can create portals to and from the pocket dimension in the Honey Rod that allow her to expel more bees from it or allow her to enter it. It's not really an effective combat spell, so Apia uses it almost exclusively to go home.

Resistances & Immunities:
- Any attacks centered around swarms or insects have very little affect on Apia due to her own powers being very similar to that.
- As per usual, Demons have a specific resistance to the Machina. To what extent this is for Apia is currenly uncertain.

Weaknesses:
- If a large portion of her swarm in battle is slain, there is a very high chance Apia might break down and just cry. There's an equally likely chance she'll swear to kill you and maim your corpse.
- As a bee and by the laws of Pokemon, her abilities are significantly hindered in the presence of fire.
- From the new vampirism affecting her, holy attacks are more effective against her, and she counts as an undead enemy.
- Any blood based magic has more of an effect on Apia due to her vampiric abilities.

Skills:
- Apia is an accomplished mother and knows her fair share of mothering.
- Apia is an astounding knitter and crocheter.
- Beekeeping is a must-have for her.
- She is able to hold a place of nobility and she can keep that.

Weapons & Equipment:
Stingers - They're stingers the size of shortswords, capable of being thrown like javelins and able to poison like darts. That's a deadly combination.
The Honey Rod - A magical wand, this weapon is capable of dispensing high amounts of bees and wasps within a very short amount of time, giving Apia a near-limitless supply of her ammunition. If the rod is seperated from her for too long, it will start spewing bees out without any orders, making them hostile to anyone around. It is similarly Apia's own pocket dimension of sorts, and she has access to it in more distinct ways than one. It's her home, and she's always carrying it around. (All subtypes of bees are categorized separately)
Scarf of the Ancients - A rather ordinary shawl given a very unique name. The best thing about it is that it's fireproof and unable to burn, but it doesn't protect the user's entire body when worn.

Sample Post

An Unexpected Interaction

A collaboration between Lmpkio and Gardevoiran

The dungeons of Hell were becoming more and more vacant as the minutes passed, the very faint sound of bees buzzing through the halls and halls of the dungeon, blood littering the floor in splotches and drops. Pools had existed, it would seem, but they had long been dried up by the time that had passed. Either that, or by the actions of one specific newborn vampire.

"Ahh~" Apia said as she arose from another carcass, the cell they had been contained in opened and the victim within it drained of all blood. "... the taste is fading, but it's more metallic than the last one." Apia had been eating residents left and right, but she made extra careful to not consume those that had been required to be captured. Only the ones long forgotten by society and those that could be cared less about. A crimson beard flowed around the bee's mouth as she stood, wiping the liquid from her mouth.

However, her unquenchable bloodlust did not go completely unnoticed. By sheer dumb coincidence, the Ice Lich Ghelgath had just reached the dungeon for a simple visit to a certain prisoner. He was a captive of a recent conquest, a banker that owes him money. It wasn't even that much, just a mere gold coin in fact after he forced the captive to swallow it as a joke. This was only 5 hours ago and he's running late to see him, hoping he wasn't excused to take a shit before he can gut him like a pig with an icicle and retrieve it from his gut. He just hopes he's still in his cell since he was locked up here. Yet as he approaches his cell door, he sees the entire hallway soaked in blood. Not only that, most of the victims seemed to look completely white, as if all of their blood had just been drained from their body.

"Jeez." Ghelgath sighs as he begins to approach the banker's cell, "Sure hope Mr. Moneybags didn't give Dracula a tip to avoid extraction day or somethin'."

As he opens the door, he sees the banker, drained nearly to the bone with blood smears streaking the walls. The lich hurries over to his corpse and checks him throughly for the ingested coin. To his dismay, the coin was nowhere to be seen. He hisses in defeat as he gives a good kick to the banker's ribs, breaking a rib in the process before walking out back into the halls. But never mind the coin, what kind of maniac decided to go for a mass blood transfusion? And why here out of all the places?

"Ghelgath?" Apia's voice choked out when she heard the voice of the lich. This was going to be... difficult to explain in the very least. The bees within the dungeon all swarmed into the Honey Rod as she began to wipe the blood off her face hurriedly, trying to cover her evidence of her actions here. She liked the lich, and she knew that the relationship would be short lived if he found out that she was the one to give all of these people a good suck.

Ugh. Thinking about that innuendo gave her a bad taste in her mouth. Maybe that was just the blood of that banker though, she didn't know it for sure.

The voice followed by an intense sound of buzzing wings grabbed the cold lich's attention as he looks to see the Bee Queen running down the dark halls with her worker drones to greet the ice lich. And what's she doing here? Did she happen to do this by any chance? And if she did this, why the hell did she even conceive of doing it here? The next battle was supposedly taking later tonight, just long enough for a bloodthirsty murder to resist the temptation of going on a murder spree.

"Apia?" he asks confusingly as he takes another glance at his surroundings, "The Hell are you doing here? Did you happen to make this big ole' mess?"

"W-what? Me? N-no I didn't, I came in here and f-ACK!" Apia's speech was interrupted by the sudden cough, rocketing a gold coin directly at Ghelgath's chest. How in the world did that get inside her? Was it... she probably got way too into the eating of that banker. Gross. Gold was not as edible as blood.

Apia's face was reddened by the sudden appearance of the coin, and her embarrassment was emphasized further by her hands shooting up to cover her mouth out of shock. Apia's eyes were wide as she looked back at Ghelgath, unsure of what was coming next.

Ghelgath stares down at what the bee coughed up and bends down to take a look. Unsurprisingly, it was just as he thought. A gold coin. But was it THE gold coin that the banker swallowed? He inspects it carefully, inspecting every detail, scratch, and dent to make sure if it really was it. And sure enough...

It was!

He looks back at Apia in slight disbelief, but rather of horror he was more so impressed as he raises an eyebrow and nods. An innocent looking bee like her did this? Well then. There was only one possible answer he can give to this situation as Ghelgath flips the coin randomly with his thumb.

"You know I'm not even mad." he bluntly replies as he places it in his pocket, "I'm actually quite impressed. I thought I'd be seeing more, puffy-faces and oozing puss rather then blood-sucking and gore-splattering."

The Lich takes a quick glance behind him before turning around.

"How many did you kill already?" he simply asks the bee with nothing else to say.

Apia looks down the hall before lowering her mouth to count, fangs poking out slightly from her mouth. "... I lost count...." That was honest truth. She was being blinded by hunger to the point where counting was foregone in exchange for satisfying her hunger pains. Did it work well? Absolutely. She had to have gone through at least fifty prisoners before Ghelgath entered. Hopefully Rufus or Ira doesn't see what happened here. They might be livid at Apia... or... maybe they wouldn't. This was hell, after all.

"... I feel unclean... but I feel so pure now. Like one of those... things in the Machina... what were they, virgins? Like a re-virgin thing?" She couldn't figure out what she was trying to stay, and ended up just stammering. "Why do I feel this way...?"

The Ice Lich scratches his head as he continues looking at the absolute carnage down the hall. She definitely must've murdered a good chunk of the prisoners in this section before he arrived. And RILD will not be pleased with such a mess going uncleaned... in fact, weren't they going to do a prison inspection here today before the battle? If he's found here, he's also going to get blamed for this entire thing alongside the obvious culprit. He gives an audible groan as he signals the bee to come.

"Well I'm sure as Hell aint gonna be cleaning this mess up." he mutters as he walks up the hallway, "Apia, I know an emergency exit at the back of the facility. RILD is gonna be inspecting this place any second now, and if you don't wanna take responsibility, I'm giving you the chance to escape janitor duty. Follow me."

"Right behind you," Apia said as she grabbed her Honey Rod and began to float behind Ghelgath, carefully looking behind the duo as they continued. All things considered, the dungeon was mostly clean, save for the bodies and the specks of blood, but there was no confirmation that the specks were actually from Apia's doing or from the past. Hopefully they would be treated as if they were from the past. The only real risk is Dana speaking up about the gift she gave Apia, but it seemed like Dana wouldn't do that. She might just keep it a secret and watch her boyfriend squirm out of ignorance and fear.

On the other hand, the cold blood of a lich was... tantalizing and close. Super close. Super tantalizing. Apia's head began to gravitate towards Ghelgath's neck before she pulled her head away with a grunt, resisting the urge to go down on Ghelgath and take his frozen blood as a quick treat. There would be time for that later, most likely.

Plus, it had time to freeze into a tasty snack. A popsicle made from chilled iron and meaty blood. Mmm...

Eventually, the two were able to reach the emergency exit and leave the prison complex. Now standing beside a platform overlooking a small hill that reaches down to the main path, Ghelgath relaxes briefly as he wipes his forehead in response to the intense rush of heat. He turns to face Apia regarding the situation.

"Ok," he begins after smacking his lips and pointing towards the trail, "Now that we're out, just walk down the hill and head to your right where you'll see a bridge. It leads to the main trail and you'll find yourself back at the castle or something, wherever you feel like being at. See ya later, I guess."

With that, he begins to walk down the platform.

"T-thank you... and goodbye..." A small portal, barely enough for Apia to comfortably get into, opened below her as she began to fly downwards into the Honey Rod's Pocket Dimension, conveniently known to her as 'Home'. As her midsection grazed the border between home and Hell, a hand raised up to sign a phrase, a very soft smile appearing over Apia's face as she did it. It would cheesily read 'I love you' before Apia flew down into the rest of the portal, it disappearing behind her.

Whether the sign language was genuine love or simply a way for her to say how enticing her treat was, it was uncertain. Apia didn't know the answer to that herself. On one hand, Ghelgath was a fine man, if not a bit cold and unfeeling, but at the same time, the scent of his frozen life stung Apia's nose sharply as if she needed it in her life. It was astoundingly mind-numbing and she loved the smell of it among other things about Ghelgath. Despite the frozen heart he had, there was an actual man in there.

And Apia was now dedicated to trying to free it, for her and for them.

Mainly for her.

Other: Optional. Anything else you can think of, like a theme song, some trivia about their personality/history/quirks/etc., and whatnot goes here.

I mulled again. I return with Apia first, then other characters depending on how well the next battle goes.

Review plox. I'll have the hider for Apia's special bees up later for review.

[TheWendil]

@Gardevoiran

If she's going to develop the power of portals, you should put that in the Powers Section. Other than that, she's fine by me.

[KoL]

@Gardevoiran

You are wrong on one account in that CS. Blood Magic is more effective than ever on Apia noite that she became a vampire. After all, that's a Primordial exclusive ability made to destroy lesser vampires and humans.

In essence, Apia is a walking blob of blood of blood now. Anyone that can clap a finger and set blood on unquenchable fire, or turn it into assassin rose bushes, has a natural edge over her.

[thewizardguy]

@TheWindel

Would that be two bodies destroyed, or would just switching bodies on his own time count towards this limit? Because I imagine just switching bodies normally wouldn't contribute to a time limit, it'd just give him some nice versatility.

His regen factor should be fine, though, considering it's his only real defensive ability. Most of his bodies are going to be fairly easy to deal with, taking serious damage from every attack. Kind of needs wolverine-y regen in order to not get rapidly destroyed in any combat. If he also has a 2-body limit, I'd prefer him to at least be able to get some mileage out of said bodies.

@KoL

My intention had been to throw out a bunch of 'hooks' that could easily be fitted into whatever story threads were already being woven. Glad to see that worked out ^-^

Also, just to specify on the technology vs incorporeal thing, your post seems to imply that all machina combat technology is already 'tuned' to fight incorporeal entities. Like, their weapons all have anti-ghost functions built in to the weapon. Whereas I would assume this to generally not be the case, and that most of the time they'd need at least a separate, specialised weapon for that.

Not trying to undermine you here, just asking for some clarification. Promise I'll shut up if you answer me.

[Gardevoiran]

@KoL@TheWindel@Floodtalon
Edits have been made to the original CS, including a theme song.

[KoL]

@thewizardguy

The problem with changing bodies indefinitely until two of them get destroyed is that it extends the battles to an unreasonable limit. I'll let Windel have the final say on these matters teamsters to powers, but I guess that all of us know that overextending isn't good for the story's health.

Regarding Machina tech, I think that my description was pretty encompassing. The other player characters are free to do as they choose (including the widely spread disregard for some basic lore), but the standard Machina tech is widely based on Eos' systems. 8/10 of it is certainly geared towards fighting the kind of threats she was built to EXTERMINATE!!! That's, pretty much anything the Machina bring to battle can and will hurt ghosts/other supernatural beings, in a way or another.

@Gardevoiran

She seems ok for me now. Wait for the others' word.

[Flood]

@Gardevoiran

I see no problem with Apia.

[TheWendil]

@thewizardguy

2 bodies destroyed in battle. Switching bodies on his own time don't count to the limit because he, assumingly, shouldn't be in battle when he does that. Otherwise the battles would be extended for too long and given your post rate, we don't want to hold up people. As for his healing factor, my decision remains for you to tone it down since he should have the same durability as the body he takes over. He can have a healing factor, but not to the point where it is impossible to kill him.

[thewizardguy]

Figured I'd throw in a Machina character, cuz I never got to play one of those.

Hider

Name: Daedalus
Allegiance/Faction: Machina
Race: Android
Appearance: to be added

Backstory:
A miracle of technology, all in the Machina venerate High Queen Eos. Everyone shows this veneration in different ways but Arch-577, a semi-sentient automated production factory, showed it through copying. They say copying is the sincerest form of flattery, after all. As such Arch-577 began on creating a second Eos. Copy isn't the right word, perhaps. A better word might be 'Tribute'. The Daedalus was designed to capture both the stunning power and grace of Eos, a shadow image that would carry the will of the Machian to the battlefront. Something akin to a Machina 'Captain America', designed to mirror the Machine Empress. An extension of her mighty will, and a most effective tool at her disposal.

Many prototypes were thrown out before work began on the concept that would eventually become the first functioning Daedalus model. Both beautiful and terrifyingly effective, the Daedalus resembled an angel made of metal on the field of battle. Of course several sacrifices had to be made in order to create this model. The technology incorporated elements of forgotten 'ancient' technology in the power core in order to make the idea even remotely feasible. While many other models were created with some degree of combat potential, none were able to match the Daedalus.

In the end it's unknown if Eos was ever a fan of this strange imitation. Daedalus was a powerful weapon, and thus was sent into battle.

Powers:
[Magnetic Field Manipulation]
The main technology Daedalus was designed around, the ability to manipulate electromagnetic fields. Can use these to move around anything magnetic, including most metals and it's own body. By ionising and superheating air Daedalus is capable of generating plasma, which can then be manipulated through use of the electromagnetic field control. Fields of plasma can be used to form forcefields, projectiles, and weapons for Daedalus to wield. Plasma generation usually happens around or near Daedalus, preventing him from generating a bunch of plasma explosions halfway across the map. He actually needs to 'throw' them at the enemy, accelerating them with magnetism in much the same way a railgun works. Electricity generation can also be used to generate an ionised tunnel of air and then send a bolt of lightning through it, much like lightning works in nature. However this is generally far less effective.

[Electromagnetic Burst]
By simply firing waves of electromagnetism Daedalus is capable of disabling enemy technology. This knocks most enemy tech out of the air for a few moments, or at least causes it to fritz out. Biological targets can be 'microwaved' by exposing them over an extended period of time. This ability also has a tendency to disrupt communication.

[Modular Design]
Daedalus is in fact designed from pieces not solidly attached to one another, but instead held together by a powerful magnetic field. This allows him to spontaneously alter it's design to bring out components usually stored internally. It also allows it's body to be seperated and put back together again, so long as the individual components are not destroyed. A quite effective defense mechanism against blunt impact force.

[Sentinel Package]
Capable of using electromagnetic fields to sense it's environment. Considering most anything naturally has or produces an electromagnetic field of some kind this is a fairly effective medium, and in fact replaces more traditional sensors. It grants Daedalus 360 vision and the ability to 'see' around corners and through walls. As well as to detect a number of things not clear to the bare eye.

Resistances & Immunities: Incredibly resistant to heat.
Weaknesses: If it's power is negated/drained it's body will quite literally fall apart. Like any Machina technology, Daedalus is vulnerable to demonic corruption.
Skills: Capable of analyzing and copying enemy moves. Becomes more dangerous the more information it has.
Weapons & Equipment: Will often bring specialised weaponry to the table depending on the task at hand. Standardly brings proximity mines and monomolecular blades.

Sample Post:

Hider

Unleashing inhuman shrieks into the night, the hellhounds tore across the battlefield. Their bloodsoaked forms bounded across the dark red stone as they hunted down what remained of the armoured squadron. A small group of soldiers moved steadily backwards unleashing pulses of bright red light from their rifles at the incoming demons. One of the beasts was struck several times, the hardlight beam simultaneously impaling it and cooking most of it's insides, and it went down with a gurgling wail. Another simply screeched, unleashing a series of thin needles from within the folds of it's flesh that embedded themselves into the visors and helmets of several soldiers. Behind them a city burned, razed to the ground by a horde of demons emerging from a rift in the sky. Several more shrieks heralded the arrival of flying warbeasts, and the sergeant barked a full retreat over the communicator even as he unleashed a final volley against the encroaching demonic forces. One of the beasts emerged from thin air, still crackling with demonic red energy. It's jaws closed on his rifle and bit it clean in half, forcing the sergeant back. Ripping one of the needles from his armour he charged the beast, impaling it through the throat even as it's snapping jaws reached for his face.

Suddenly a bright streak of light moved across the sergeant's vision and the beast was hurled from it's feet. A large smoking hole had opened in it's side leaving it twitching and dying on the ground. Bolts of light rained from the sky, ripping through the demonic horde like a rain of falling stars. A hellhound dodged to the side only to have the radiant orb follow it's movements, slicing through the beast and then dissipating into nothingness. Awestruck, the sergeant gazed up at what he could only describe as a miracle.

Two massive wings of radiant blue light held aloft a featureless figure of clean metal. It hovered far above the battlefield, as if judging all that it saw. Blue fire spilled forth from one of it's hands, consuming a nearby winged beast as it was sent crashing to the ground. Shafts of blue light formed around it, before launching themselves at the demons on the ground. Incoming balls of flame and needles were were intercepted by a lighter blue light flaring around the being, as if they had struck a forcefield of some kind. Silently, the sergeant dropped what remained of his weapon.

The demons were retreating.

Other:

[KoL]

@thewizardguy

I'll give a proper review of this new character, after I post Eos' CS here, in a few hours at most (probably earlier). His backstory alone requires quite a lot of corrections and adaptations, in order to align it with the Machina lore that keeps on being disregarded by the players on a steady basis.

[Thecrash20]

@thewizardguy

I'll give a proper review of this new character, after I post Eos' CS here, in a few hours at most (probably earlier). His backstory alone requires quite a lot of corrections and adaptations, in order to align it with the Machina lore that keeps on being disregarded by the players on a steady basis.

@KoL

Good thing I read that before writing the backstory. I assumed Humanity was conquered by the Machines. Not helped them and just hid them away. You know cause they give the other entities power and such so why not wipe them out.

[Lonewolf685]

Rufus, King of Hell

---

• Name: Rufus
• Title/Epiphet: Vagrant King. The Creeping Chaos. Ruffles. That Idiot Over There. Chicken Flinger.
• Allegiance/Faction: Demons of Hell
• Race: Eldritch Horror

• Summary: Hell's central leadership has always existed in a swirling maelstrom of conflict where secretive coups where as common as vagabond swordsman demanding the crown at the end of their blade. As such, Hell has a long line of would be monarchs holding onto the ephemeral power for precious little time before being replaced once more. The truth of the matter was, Rufus was fond of long vacations and left this throne open while he gallivanted across space, time, and his girlfriend's couch.

Bearing the visage of a youthful human he commanded Hell from the comfort of a ratty couch he found by a dumpster, and passed decrees as random as they were counter intuitive. Anyone asked upon the infernal plane can regal one with tales of captive Angels being given command of armies on a whim, or of parties ruined by stray chicken nuggets hurled upon hell hounds. Whatever method exists to his madness has yet to be gleamed by the vast majority of his followers.

Yet Rufus reign was undisputed and no challenger to his couch could so much as blink before they were departed from his domain without a trace, and it was only in the course of an interstellar vacation to a galaxy far, far away that Hell came to have two new monarchs, the former's reign a paltry one in terms of length before the latter begrudgingly took office. The return of Rufus with ball and chain in toe aboard a crashing star ship riding the explosive current of an act of creation foretold an epic struggle between an Arch Demon, a enthusiastic gardener with a parasol, the Vagrant King, and a Primordial vampire glued to his hip!

Only for no such event to happen, and Rufus brought about sweeping to reform to Hell's government with the institution of a four person Oligarchy to usher in a golden age for all of Hell. He was just that nice of a guy.

• Powers:

— Thinking Outside the Box: One looks at Rufus and perceives a mortal shell existing in the present. Rufus looks at the universe and glimpses the past, present, and possibilities of the future simultaneously. The shifting of the cosmos and the slithering of the serpent coiled about the Nexus brush against his senses constantly. Rufus glimpses the possibilities for future intrigue and plucks them from the air, forging a new future from the abstract inanities others pass up.

— Portals: No one has witnessed Rufus fight. What he has achieved is through naught but the application of portals. There is no limit upon these portals, whether it be distance, time, or mass is irrelevant to the Vagrant King's ability. This is the pinnacle of the very concept of translocation, and one he covets above all other power, disdaining those who possess yet squander such feats.

— Monstrous Truth: What is seen is a lie, and what is truth is beyond comprehension. Should he wish it, the truth will be revealed, his name known, and those before his gaze shall witness the reality of the Creeping Chaos as it envelops them.

---

[KoL]

First things first. Eos' CS is updated with her most iconic powers for the sake of completion.

Now, on to other matters...

@Thecrash20 Your character has a few points that need reconsideration. I'll address the main one first and then dissect it, since the idea itself isn't bad but it'll require multiple changes.

We don't want characters able to resist and counter everything that's thrown their way, or so hard to kill that they would drag the battles into oblivion.

With that said, let's go down to specifics:

Not Birthed, but crafted: Nid had been created with a Sister and Brother unit in a time that Androids were in smaller numbers and wanted a trump card against the Super Natural. He was crafted to move faster than Humans could properly track, even faster then older model tracking and targeting modules could process into data. Having the strength of three Slave-Droids, but being as delicate as any non-combat android. Artificial skin wrapped around his servos and fiber muscles with milky white coolant to keep his body cool. To provide the optimal strength intended he was created with something very special to him, three artificial hearts. Like most androids, one of these hearts provided power to the body and processing unit in the head,but it increased his overall power generated and provided a faster way to cool the systems with increased coolant flow and cooling. This allowed Nid to have the Aptitude of a Non-combat Android, the Strength of a few Slave-Droids, and Witting of a combat model. While it would be overkill for a model that could be decommissioned easily as any Android at the time, these custom features were added to provide the power he would need to use his custom made Mobile Suit.

@Thecrash20

This ability in itself isn't bad, however, the description has an issue. There are no such things as Slave Droids. The closest would be non-sentient drones, but they can't be considered slaves, more than a factory robot of today can. That beats the point of the Machina completely.

Now, while I'm at this, I'll address something that will be important to everyone as well. Before anyone else raises this issue.

Originally, there was a restriction on all of the Machina power sources being directly beamed from Eos, instead of them carrying their own batteries/reactors/whatever. I'll lift that in order for player characters to have some more freedom, however, I'm banning the source of this restriction which are "fusion reactor bombs". PCs are banned from trying to blow themselves in this kind of cheap shot, unless there's an self-destruction function clearly stated on their CS.

Apologies if that doesn't apply to you, but it was so much of a source of problems before that I thought it would be better to make it explicit now rather than later.

Advanced Chaos Security Suite: Even as an android, Nid was designed to be resistant to Corruption from Holy and Hellish powers. Although its additional defense not given to many, it he is still vulnerable to Demonic Corruption.

@Thecrash20

This one is a problem, for two reasons.

First, there's a logical fail there: How can he be resistant and weak to Demons at the same time? Hellish Powers, Demonic corruption, Unholy Magic and such are interchangeable terms. They all mean the same thing: Evil powers coming from Demons and other Hell associated characters.

Second, a Machina should be weak against those kinds of attacks. We don't want characters that are able to do everything and resist everything.

Knights Armament Software V2: A ancient software, Giving the User the knowledge and skill from any known Human Sword Fighting techniques. It also gave the ability to use his reflexes and allowing for super-fast or high-precision cuts. Able to easily deflect and cut through incoming attacks.

Prototype Battle-Droid: Being an ancient model, designed for combat at a time where Numbers were small. To the average modern Android solider, Nidhoggur has advanced Hand to hand combat skills, weapon training, and critical thinking software stock with his Operating system. Allowing him to be more creative and 'intelligent' in combat than the modern Combat Android.
Advanced Overlay HUD and Range System: Nid does not see with normal eyes. Very similar to current Combat Androids, a Overlay and HUD are always in his eye sight. Giving him real time data on his systems and the environment around him. Allowing him to process things faster than most Android could dream of. Enough to see projectile rounds rushing his way. The Range tracking unit enables him to judge ranges, velocity, and orbit of anything he can physically see.

@Thecrash20

This combination of abilities is ok, as long as it doesn't make him untouchable/impossible to damage. Beware of that.

AEGIS Mobile Defense Suit: Model Knight v2.2

One of the First types of his armor kind. Currently it's very rare due to the history behind it. While current technology surpasses the time this was made, the concept is untouched by time. It was more than Power-Armor but not quite a Mechsuit. The happy medium of the two that was too costly to have more than one. At that day and age quality was key in making Nidhoggur's Purpose complete. The Armor itself is made of Tungsten fibers interwoven with a Titanium-Copper mix. Providing maximum protection from projectile and heat damage while still being light enough to move freely. Stronger and more effective than even the Individual shield units placed in modern Combat Androids. Although the power it holds comes at a great cost. A loss of life. Once a unit is placed in this suit, it is impossible to take them out. The neural link within forever traps the user in it's husk. This meant little for Nid as he was bred to live and die in the suit. Although for the Nexus, the armor was properly adjusted. His armor contains a personal shield generator that helps resist the damaging effects of Super natural effects. Also his armor has ancient Human inscription etched to his armor that rumor to provide resilience for these super natural foe's powers.

@Thecrash20

This one is ok as well, however, it aso contains a misunderstanding. The Machina don't really have a notion of cost, or upkeep. THe only reason this armor wouldn't be mass produced is if it was built as some kind of test, purpose engineered device, the pet project of some scientist, or if Eos deemed it a failure in the long run.

The Machina are a Post Scarcity, Post Singularity society, the concepts of production, cost and labor are meaningless for them. It's kinda like this dor the whole of the Nexus, but it's blatantly evident on the Machina.

Hyperion: High-frequency blade

Created with super light, but highly durable metal. This sword is reinforced by a powerful alternating current and resonating at extremely high vibration frequencies. This oscillation weakened the molecular bonds of anything it cuts, thereby increasing its cutting ability. Striking, cutting, and thrusting attacks were performed with the blade, with the sharpened edge and point used for lethal attacks, and the blunt edge used as a clubbing weapon. Nidhoggur was also able to wield the blade with such accuracy and speed that they were able to deflect bullets. The Sword can retract to Nid's forearm to allow a free hand, springing out from under his palm when ready to use. It had been made to strike the opponents of the light and dark with ease.

Hyperion: Power-Shield

This shield is created with the same material that the armor Nidhoggur dons. Although just above the handle, a internal Gravitic energy field generator hides. Rendering all but the most powerful blows completely ineffective. The shield provides protection against both melee and ranged attacks and it is able to withstand an assault from even heavy weaponry such as a direct attack from an artillery cannon. The shield can collapse and magnetically slide from his hand to his forearm, giving him a free hand. Similiar to his armor, a shielding field has been Jury rigged to coexist with the stock Gravitic energy field generator and etched inscription provides resistance to Super Natural attacks.

Hyperion: 'Bull Dozer' Auto-Cannon

A Mech Suit pistol is the Main Range weapon of Nidhoggur. For Nidhoggur's size it looks closer to a smaller Rifle, carried on his higher back. Carrying up to 12 76mm Explosive Slug rounds. Inside the round a tiny amount of conventional explosive charge is utilized alongside rocket propellant. This charge is just strong enough to force the slug out of the barrel and ignite the slug's propellant. The rocket-propellant is carefully fused to ignite just after leaving the barrel, alleviating any possibility of pressure build-up. The Slug then accelerates away towards the target under its own power. It is designed to penetrate the target and then detonate, causing immense damage and leaving little opportunity for survival. Blessed rounds containing holy water instead of the conventional explosive round have been given to Nidhoggur to deal with Demonic foes more effectively and Unholy inscription rounds to deal with the Holier targets.

AEGIS Mobile Defense Suit: Thrusts

Behind his back, lower hips, and above the ankles small Thrusters have been fitted to his unit to allow quick movements. Either helping him avoid attack or adding extra strength in his. These Micro-thrusts also allow him to make high leaps in the air.

@Thecrash20

None of these are bad, again, with the caveat that they don't make him invincible. Two things though, I don't know if you read the declaration I made about the Machina tech before, so here's a link: https://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/4570678

Also, as a bit of trivia that you may or not know, Hyperion is the name of the Machina capital. This is not a problem, I'm just pointing it for when it becomes relevant.

I'll wait until your character is ready to review it again, but I guess that pointing these will save you time while you edit him.

Now, @thewizardguy.

First of all, you need to edit that backstory and make it in accordance to the suggestions we discussed on Discord, or anything else you may choose that doesn't clash against the lore. Now, for specifics:

[Magnetic Field Manipulation]
The main technology Daedalus was designed around, the ability to manipulate electromagnetic fields. Can use these to move around anything magnetic, including most metals and it's own body. By ionising and superheating air Daedalus is capable of generating plasma, which can then be manipulated through use of the electromagnetic field control. Fields of plasma can be used to form forcefields, projectiles, and weapons for Daedalus to wield. Plasma generation usually happens around or near Daedalus, preventing him from generating a bunch of plasma explosions halfway across the map. He actually needs to 'throw' them at the enemy, accelerating them with magnetism in much the same way a railgun works. Electricity generation can also be used to generate an ionised tunnel of air and then send a bolt of lightning through it, much like lightning works in nature. However this is generally far less effective.

@thewizardguy

This one is ok. I don't see a problem with this kind of weaponry.

[Electromagnetic Burst]
By simply firing waves of electromagnetism Daedalus is capable of disabling enemy technology. This knocks most enemy tech out of the air for a few moments, or at least causes it to fritz out. Biological targets can be 'microwaved' by exposing them over an extended period of time. This ability also has a tendency to disrupt communication.

@thewizardguy

That's fine as well, as long as you are aware that this is a power that is extremely prone to disastrous friendly fire. You'd better take care when you unleash it, because it can have some serious consequences. Also, it will not affect corrupted demonic tech with the full strength of the burst. I can certainly work as intended on Angel tech, even if their source of power is holy energy, it's still tech so their circuits can be overloaded and fried temporarily.

[Modular Design]
Daedalus is in fact designed from pieces not solidly attached to one another, but instead held together by a powerful magnetic field. This allows him to spontaneously alter it's design to bring out components usually stored internally. It also allows it's body to be seperated and put back together again, so long as the individual components are not destroyed. A quite effective defense mechanism against blunt impact force.

@thewizardguy

As long as this doesn't make him immune to physical damage it's ok. I'd suggest to make it so that he can only get disassembled into main parts (torso, limbs and head), instead of breaking down into tiny components. This way, it's still a defense, but still presents a target to be hit.

[Sentinel Package]
Capable of using electromagnetic fields to sense it's environment. Considering most anything naturally has or produces an electromagnetic field of some kind this is a fairly effective medium, and in fact replaces more traditional sensors. It grants Daedalus 360 vision and the ability to 'see' around corners and through walls. As well as to detect a number of things not clear to the bare eye.

@thewizardguy

As long as the range of this electromagnetic "Byakugan" isn't too big, it's ok. Also, be aware that most demonic cloaking powers, as well as any matter of undead creatures would be able to surpass it completely, effectively making your character blind to them.

Weaknesses: If it's power is negated/drained it's body will quite literally fall apart.

@thewizardguy

Add weakness to Demonic corruption.

Skills: Capable of analyzing and copying enemy moves. Becomes more dangerous the more information it has.

@thewizardguy

Explain how, and to what extent, he can copy others' moves, please.

Unleashing inhuman shrieks into the night, the hellhounds tore across the battlefield. Their bloodsoaked forms bounded across the dark red stone as they hunted down what remained of the armoured squadron. A small group of soldiers moved steadily backwards unleashing pulses of bright red light from their rifles at the incoming demons. One of the beasts was struck several times, the hardlight beam simultaneously impaling it and cooking most of it's insides, and it went down with a gurgling wail. Another simply screeched, unleashing a series of thin needles from within the folds of it's flesh that embedded themselves into the visors and helmets of several soldiers. Behind them a city burned, razed to the ground by a horde of demons emerging from a rift in the sky. Several more shrieks heralded the arrival of flying warbeasts, and the sergeant barked a full retreat over the communicator even as he unleashed a final volley against the encroaching demonic forces. One of the beasts emerged from thin air, still crackling with demonic red energy. It's jaws closed on his rifle and bit it clean in half, forcing the sergeant back. Ripping one of the needles from his armour he charged the beast, impaling it through the throat even as it's snapping jaws reached for his face.

Suddenly a bright streak of light moved across the sergeant's vision and the beast was hurled from it's feet. A large smoking hole had opened in it's side leaving it twitching and dying on the ground. Bolts of light rained from the sky, ripping through the demonic horde like a rain of falling stars. A hellhound dodged to the side only to have the radiant orb follow it's movements, slicing through the beast and then dissipating into nothingness. Awestruck, the sergeant gazed up at what he could only describe as a miracle.

Two massive wings of radiant blue light held aloft a featureless figure of clean metal. It hovered far above the battlefield, as if judging all that it saw. Blue fire spilled forth from one of it's hands, consuming a nearby winged beast as it was sent crashing to the ground. Shafts of blue light formed around it, before launching themselves at the demons on the ground. Incoming balls of flame and needles were were intercepted by a lighter blue light flaring around the being, as if they had struck a forcefield of some kind. Silently, the sergeant dropped what remained of his weapon.

The demons were retreating.

@thewizardguy

You character is not an Angel, demons wouldn't run away from him so easily. Ganging up on Machina is one of the most basic Demon strategies, considering that nearly all of them can fly, and most fight with suicidal abandon because running away means that they have to face RILD's wrath, this story feels very exaggerated... to say the least.

You can keep the theme, but please review it.

[TheWendil]

I've placed KoL's explanation for Machina technology in the first post of the thread, just below the zeroth post. Further lore related material, both IC and OOC will go there from now on so be sure to check it periodically.

[KoL]

Deva has been added to the NPCs list, in case anyone wants to check on the ruler of Heaven.

[thewizardguy]

@KoL

I was aware the effect would be more limited on demonic tech and expected a bigger limiter on angelic tech, but it was mainly just an ability that fit with the theme and punished people who fought him with stolen machina tech. The modular design thing would allow him to reform his hand into a sword, for example, and it only really helps against blunt force. Can make it easier to dodge something like a sword slice, but definitely not immunity.

I was expecting that all cloaking would protect from the electro-sense unless it was specifically light-only, although demonic versions being absolute seems a little harsh to me. It also seems strange that undead would be invisible? Did you mean just incorporeal undead, or just being a skeleton? Cuz that seems strange to me.

I'll add the weakness and the copying thing was intended more as a 'style' than an ability. If he fights someone who dual-wields swords than he's likely to make swords out of his plasma in order to copy them. He doesn't gain new abilities or anything like that, his versatile ability just allows him to play monkey-see-monkey-do with his opponents.

While I understand the post being misleading and can agree with your criteria, do you mind terribly if I just declare this one non-canon and go with it? I find writing up posts to be rather time-consuming business, and would prefer to not have to rewrite the whole thing. I can understand adding it to the screening process, but the existing post should function for that purpose even if it doesn't necessarily make sense lore-wise.

Thanks for the review, though ^-^

[Lonewolf685]

I was expecting that all cloaking would protect from the electro-sense unless it was specifically light-only, although demonic versions being absolute seems a little harsh to me. It also seems strange that undead would be invisible? Did you mean just incorporeal undead, or just being a skeleton? Cuz that seems strange to me.

@thewizardguy

To enforce the weakness to Demons.

While I understand the post being misleading and can agree with your criteria, do you mind terribly if I just declare this one non-canon and go with it? I find writing up posts to be rather time-consuming business, and would prefer to not have to rewrite the whole thing. I can understand adding it to the screening process, but the existing post should function for that purpose even if it doesn't necessarily make sense lore-wise.

No, make a new post. Standards have to be met.

[Nogg Saron]

The Blighted Herald

Name: Tholman Orcus

Title/Epiphet: The Blighted Herald, Bringer of Plagues, Oracle of Disease

Allegiance/Faction: Hell

Race: Corrupted Soul

Age: 827

Gender: Male

Height: 6'2"

Weight: 98 lbs.

Appearance:

Backstory:

Tholman Kain, now known as Tholman Orcus, is a Corrupted Soul who has achieved a higher status in the forces of the Demonic than the average mortal soul. Tholman was a Plague Doctor while he was alive. Traveling from city to city "Treating" them for disease. Yet it was more than likely that it was his contaminated instruments that actually brought the plague to the area. While he was alive Tholman was a cruel, cold, and calculating man. His patients often left treatments with more injuries than they had arrived with in the name of 'keeping them clean'. For who were they to go against the word of a doctor?

This cruelty ultimately led to his demise, as one day one of his 'Treatments' went a little too far. He was treating a young boy who was simply suffering from a mild flu, however the parents had no idea what was wrong with him. Tholman blew the disease out of proportion to scare the parents into purchasing his services. When the boy was asleep he injected a virus into his system, but he was caught in the act as one of the parents walked in. He played it off as a routine shot, and at first they were suspicious but trusting. That was, until the boy died 5 days later to a disease far worse than he had originally been showing symptoms of. Tholman was found guilty of the crime and was hung for it and his numerous other crimes. Tholman didn't fear death, and the executioner was disturbed to find he was smiling from start to finish of his execution.

His grandiose cruelty in life earned Tholman a spot in Hell and he was more than a little excited to arrive. Among the souls damned to Hell, some of which he had placed there, Tholman quickly became well known. He would often attempt to do what he had done in life, going about, finding those who were injured and attempting to 'help' them. Often placing the sods who trusted him in a significantly worse state than they had begun in.

It wasn't long before Tholman was shown to have prowess for not only tactics but also had an innate magic about him. Much like he was in life, Tholman brought disease wherever he went, and the higher his status among the demons grew, the more powerful this disease became. Demonic Corruption festered in Tholman's body like a petri dish, becoming incredibly concentrated and.. potent. His personality changed along with it, what was off-put cruelty has become more and more pronounced. He relishes the pain he inflicts on his enemies more than any human soul should. As such, many humans began simply calling him a Demon. Tholman has even begun believing that he was always meant to be a demon, and calls it his "Ultimate Calling."

Powers:

Aura of Decay: The Herald radiates disease and decay around him at all times. Plants wither and die, food spoils, and enemies are stricken with debilitating diseases. This aura is most potent in a roughly 20 ft circle around him, but plants and animals stricken with this disease can spread the plague further, albeit significantly more slowly. Enemies stricken with the disease may find their ability to heal significantly slowed.

Corrupted Touch: He who brings plague also carries great corruption. While The Herald lacks most of the abilities of one who would directly damage or attack an opponent, he covers this weakness by having some of the greatest stores of corrupting energies among demon kind. He can corrupt beings and Machina in a fraction of the time it takes others. Corruption is like a disease, and he is Patient Zero.

Symbiosis: While most diseases are harmful, some creatures form cooperative relationships with what was once a deadly plague. The same is for the Herald. Allied beings that are within the Heralds Aura of Decay become empowered by the disease, granting them increased resistance to effects that would hinder them, especially those of poisonous or decaying sort. The symbiotic disease also promotes healing, though not enough to shrug off wounds immediately.

Leeching: Some say Tholman is sadistic, for his only method of direct attack is quite literally a death of a thousand cuts. They wouldn't be wrong. The Heralds only method of direct attack is launching small leeches that latch on to any source of life energy, draining them. These leeches carry the Heralds signature disease and (if possible) leave open, bleeding wounds that are incredibly slow to heal.

Resistances & Immunities:

Immunity to Disease: As would make plain sense, the Herald is himself immune to the diseases he carries. Which most believe to be all of them.

Resistance to Poison: The amount of symbiotic bacteria and fungi that make their home within the herald filter out most poisonous materials due to their already volatile nature.

Weaknesses:

Weakness to Healing Magic: While most of the Heralds abilities suppress healing magic, if The Herald is instead directly targeted with such magic he instead takes significant damage. While under the effects of healing magic, he is himself unable to heal.

Weakness to Holy Magic: Holy Magic has a similar effect upon the Herald to Healing Magic (Which are often one and the same), however magic that is purely holy is simply more powerful against him due to his Demonic Corruption. It does not prevent his healing.

Skills:

Cruelty Abounding: The Herald is very quick to pick up on the weaknesses of those he faces. He is constantly making a profile of those he sees in his head so he may more effectively cause them pain. Maybe they hesitate when swinging a sword in one direction due to a childhood injury, perhaps they avoid placing themselves in certain positions due to a blind spot they are compensating for. Regardless of what it is, the cold, calculating mind of the Herald is fast to pick up on it. Given, this becomes less effective the larger the number of enemies and sheer data to calculate.

Doctor's Knowledge: The Herald is familiar with all diseases, as well as ailments of most kinds, and can treat almost any wound, given enough time. However, applying this knowledge on the battlefield is easier said than done, and thus he does most of his direct doctor work outside of battle.

Weapons & Equipment:

Visage of Oncoming Plague: The Herald's Mask, the sight of this enchanted mask can cause the weak willed to flee in terror, while it may temporarily demoralize even those of powerful will. To look upon The Herald's face is to look upon an oncoming disaster.

Plagued Censer: The Herald carries with him a magical Censer that constantly emits a haze of choking gas. With the flick of the wrist he can open the outer chamber of the Censer to emit the fog in an area around him. While the fog is not likely to kill a combatant, it can provide the Herald an opportunity for either escape or counterattack. Once he has released the Censer's haze, he must wait a short period for it to refill before it can be effectively used again.

Sample Post:

A Housecall

Tholman loomed over the child, Victor was his name. Male, Roughly 3-1/2 Ft. Tall, Age 6. Tholman had a mental note of every detail of the child written out in his head. This was not a young human any longer. This was a testing subject, and these were the intial parameters.

He looked over the boy once more, then began his work. He pulled out each cruel tool of his trade. A long syringe, the point like the stinger of some unimaginably toxic creature. Leather straps, to bind and cut off blood flow. Lastly, his sticks of incense. They did not serve any particular purpose, he just enjoyed taking in the scent of Lavender as he did what he loved.

He strapped the boys arm and covered his mouth with a hand as he slid the needle in, filling the boy with the contaminated blood of another patient. Just as he finished delivering his...'gift' Tholman's moment was snapped by the creaking of a door. Looking behind there stood the boy's father. Pale as snow and a look of horror on his face as to what he was witnessing. Tholman jumped at it before assumptions were made.

"Ah! Mister Allison. Nothing to worry about, just some routine treatment! I'll make the boy some sleeping medicine and he'll be right back to it!" In the back of his mind Tholman was screaming at himself for not checking that the parents were asleep before he began. But he couldn't let it show, not in his voice at least. The boy's father looked between the two, and he gave a wary "Of...of course. Thank you again Doctor." before heading back into the hall. Tholman let out a sigh of relief internally, he couldn't believe he got away with that.

Hey there! So I made a CS. Please inform me if my attempt was not up to snuff, as well as if there are balancing issues I should address! (And if there are story things I did wrong and need to address etc. etc.)
:D

[KoL]

@Nogg Saron

Welcome aboard!

I'll take a better look at your character later.

[Lonewolf685]

@Nogg Saron

Welcome aboard, and looking at this CS, glad to have you. Looking it over I like it thematically, the backstory is solid and the powers look good to me. I only have have two things to say about it in regards to critique;

1) I don't see where the doctor is getting a Tactician skill. From his backstory I would surmise his element lays more with subterfuge, deception, and manipulation. Schemes perhaps. Though Tactics seems off to me especially when his skills seem more suited to being off the field. If you really desire a more Tactician style of character though, it would make more sense to say he spent a significant amount of time as an army surgeon so he could at least be in contact to organized military action to gleam some skill in that area. After that the Nexus would bolster the rest.

2) For the sample post, could you put spaces between the paragraphs? A few dabs of the Enter-Key makes things far more visually pleasing to read.

Other then that I like what I see. Just make sure he stays 21ft away from Lucille or she might get pissed when her plants start dying around her :3