Avatar of AdmrlStalfos19
  • Last Seen: 26 days ago
  • Joined: 8 yrs ago
  • Posts: 507 (0.17 / day)
  • VMs: 0
  • Username history
    1. AdmrlStalfos19 8 yrs ago
  • Latest 10 profile visitors:

Status

User has no status, yet

Bio

User has no bio, yet

Most Recent Posts



Suddenly, the front door of the tavern swung open and slammed against the wall. This in turn caused everyone's attention to shift towards the one man standing in the doorway, who looked to have been running all that time, and who took that time in particular to catch his breath.

"Pirates..." the man said, through heavy panting, "Pirates are here..."

The other tavern-goers were murmuring amongst themselves, questioning whether to take it seriously. Gloria however, not wanting to take any chances, immediately rushed back over to the bar, where she kept a double-barreled shotgun for emergencies just like this. She also rummaged around for any spare boxes of ammunition that she may have stored nearby, but figured she'd press this man for more information while she was there. It could never hurt, after all, right?

"How many? And where're they coming from?" asked Gloria.

"I uh... From the North, I think," the man took a moment to collect his thoughts, "And she may be on her own, but... she's everywhere..."

"Wait, what?" Gloria was dumbfounded, "What are you on about?"

Everyone else was wondering the same thing, unable to make sense of what this newcomer was trying to say. As they discussed the situation with each other, however, one man rose from his seat and cracked his knuckles.

"You said there was just one, right?" he asked the newcomer for confirmation, "In that case, why don't we pay them a visit? Surely they'll run with their tail between their le-..."

"You don't understand..." the newcomer intervened, "One minute you have her surrounded, and the next... you're all fighting amongst yourselves... and all the while, she has all the time in the world to pick you off. Furthermore, everything you could possibly throw at her just goes straight through her body, like it's not even there. It almost feels like you're... trying to fight a ghost..."

More murmurs spread across the tavern. Evidently, these people have neither seen a Devil Fruit in action nor even so much as heard of the concept. However, this new entrant had seemingly did an awfully good job of describing the Devil Fruit that had been eaten by the infamous captain of the Sea Reaver Pirates, in spite of all of that.

...

Suddenly, screams could be heard outside, followed by pounding footsteps that would louden, quieten, louden and quieten again. From the looks of things, civilians were running southbound, and they'd been running as though their lives depended on it. If they didn't know any better, one would say that an attack on Shelburgh had already begun.

"Shit! I stayed too long," seemingly having gotten a sense of second wind, the new entrant backed away from the door, and prepared to take off, "You guys will... y-you'll have to save yourselves!"

"Wait a sec! We don't even know wha-... HEY!!"

And then he was gone. Trembling in fear, Gloria had gotten into a more frantic search for spare ammunition. Noticing this, one of the men that she'd shared a toast with prior had calmly walked around the bar, and kneeled down at her side, wanting to see how she was holding up.

"Hey. You doing OK?" he asked the barkeeper, before noticing the shotgun at her side, "You know how to handle that thing, right?"

"I, uh... Of course I do," Gloria reluctantly answered, after a brief sigh, "I'm sure you can imagine the type of asshole who'd try to show me up some day. Pirate or otherwise..."

The man nodded in understanding, and stayed by her side for the moment.

...

The meathead that was itching for a fight earlier had just picked his drink again, before noticing the lurkers at the corner table from the corner of his eye. In response to this sighting, he reluctantly set it back down, and pressed it against the table in his frustration.

"Seriously? More pirates?" he asked aloud.

"Calm down, you idiot! Those ones might not have anything to do with that one-man army wreaking havoc out there!" someone else shouted at him, "And even if they do, what would picking a fight with them even do for us here?! Huh?"

"They're still pirates, dumbass!" the meathead shouted back, before returning his attention to the pirates, "Who knows what they're thinking..."

The last Sea Reaver Pirates would have most everyone else's eyes on them as well, some more leery than others. Still, pieces of the puzzle were starting to form; all the pirates would need to do from there was put them together. This sudden attack on Shelburgh would be worth investigating, one way or the other.
@AdmrlStalfos19

Since the RP started and my char app hasn't been mentioned. I assume it's been rejected?


Sorry, but yes, that would be the case. I do owe you a review though.

...

As was mentioned before, 300,000,000 Beri is more than what most of the Worst Generation have as their bounties. Granted, Zoro's and Luffy's are both much higher, as two prime exceptions from memory, but those are very special exceptions indeed. You say that you can't really enforce without the credibility to enforce with, but you should know that 100 mil, 120 mil or even 90 mil bounties could've achieved that result for you just fine.

In saying that, however, it wasn't the 300 mil bounty in and of itself, but the fact that I don't know what the guy would've done to earn that 300 mil bounty, that ultimately put me off from accepting your app. It's true that BC and Duthguy have theirs around the same ballpark, but the former had walked through his creation process with me on Discord to ensure I was OK with everything he was going for (including the bounty), and the latter originally had his much lower, and sought my permission to raise it. On top of that, Zerry's case is much more obvious; I'm sure he'd pissed off more than enough World Nobles with his efforts to free slaves off from them.

...

As I mentioned way back in the interest check thread I made for this, I will be accepting apps again at a later stage in the RP. And I'd be more than happy to let you know when I get to that exact stage if you'd like. In the mean time, I hope you understand where I'm coming from and don't take this review too hard.

One Piece:
Sea Reaver Pirates Reborn



Honorstar Garrison. What was once just an ordinary Marine base along the border of the South Blue and the East Blue, is now renowned for spelling the demise of the most notorious crew of pirates ever to terrorize the South Blue. And all it took was perseverance on the Marines' end... and a well-timed counter attack of course, just when the raiding Sea Reaver Pirates had least expected it.

It was those brave men that quelled the threat that the Sea Reaver Pirates once brought to the four Blues. And of course, news of this would travel fast, bringing joy to all the towns and villages that the infamous band of pirates had ever terrorized. Chief among those in celebration are the citizens of Shelburgh, home of the original founder of the Sea Reaver Pirates in Carrington Vail. Because of that history, Shelburgh's citizenry had been oppressed for years, and now they have a glimpse of true freedom for the first time.

We begin the tale in a local tavern of Shelburgh, where the vast majority of its occupants, including the beautiful lass that serves as that particular tavern's keeper, are in the midst of such celebration.



Morale had been high as of late, and all the men had a glass of cool ale in hand, whether they be swinging it in their arms as they sang aloud, setting it down on their respective tables whilst they chatted among friends, or even casually sipping it every so often while they took in the atmosphere. Of course, as would be typical of a tavern, the customer base primarily consisted of men, with only a sprinkling of women here and there who had either come to join in with their guy or was primarily there to ensure he didn't overdo himself.

One young lass in a green dress, however, had been serving ale to all these men and the few women that wanted some all night. This young lass, Gloria Provost, breathed a sigh of relief as she got down the last table, consisting of a trio of muscly men, one of whom was fortunate enough to have a voluptuous, rather heavy-chested lady at his side. Gloria came over to the table with five drinks in hand, and one last beaming smile to try and hide her figure.

"Heya, thanks for waiting, guys!" Gloria made herself heard over the noise going on elsewhere in the tavern as she approached the table to set the glasses of ale down, "That's one for you, one for you, one each for this fine couple..."

"...and what, the last one's supposed to be spare, is it?" the one woman at the table asked with mock judgment.

"I'll take it!" one of the two other men raised a finger, but before he could...

"What? No! This one's mine!" Gloria huddled over the glass that she'd poured for herself as if it were her own child, "Trying to rob me of the drink I earned for all the work I did tonight; the hell's wrong you all?"

Gloria had also pouted at the whole trio, but everyone at the table simply laughed it off. It was evident they were only joking about the whole thing.

"Y'know, you could hire a few girls to serve drinks here if you need the help," the male half of the couple suggested.

"I could sure try, but..." Gloria motioned the part of weighing her options, "...it's hard finding a girl my age that has nothing better to do,"

"I imagine it would be," the man mused, "Maybe someone on the mature end of the spectrum?"

"Why, you offering?" Gloria asked.

There was a brief pause in conversation at the table... until everyone realized that Gloria was talking to the other woman that was there, and consequently turned to face her.

"OH!! M-Me?! I-I couldn't possibly do it, h-heavens no," she nervously declined, "I already have a job, and well... no offense, but this seems like a serious downgrade."

"Hmm... oh well," Gloria shrugged her shoulders, "I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. In the mean time, how about we go back to the celebration, huh? Actually, if you don't mind, let's make a toast."

With that, Gloria raised her glass upwards and towards the table, with everyone at the table following suit.

"To freedom," she chanted.

"To freedom," and then they drank their drinks.

...

Little did anyone in the tavern know that the final remnants of the Sea Reaver Pirates, or rather, most of them, had seated themselves at a table in the far corner, lurking, waiting, and watching the citizenry's premature celebration unfold. It would only be a matter of time before a bad omen would befall the quaint town once more; those few remaining pirates knew that more than anything.
I'm almost ready to start the IC; henceforth, I'm announcing a due date. ALL APPS MUST BE COMPLETED BY NOVEMBER 4TH.

No exceptions. If your app isn't completed by then (or I've reason to reject it at that stage), then it sucks to be you. Of course, I'll see if I can spare the time tomorrow to review the apps that look to be completed already. In the meantime, you still should have plenty of time to get things done. Or, at the very least, I should hope so...
Aight, review time.



@Duthguy I like this guy. He's cool.

...

That's all the review you get. Go ahead and add Zerry into the Character tab.


@Squashedquatch Sorry I didn't get back to you as fast as I said I would. I've only just now had the chance to take a proper look at everyone's apps.

I appreciate that you fixed what I told you to, truly. That's exactly why I'm mad at myself for not seeing this earlier.

Ok so he was born. (I would have loved to gone into deeper detail about why but it doesn't matter because that part doesn't add anything to his personality or do anything related to the story, so I'm skipping the filler)


I... honestly don't know what I can tell you about this statement in particular, except that it's cursed. For the future, you really should just throw in bits and pieces of detail into your apps anyway, even if you don't believe it to be relevant to what a GM asks of you, or whatever else. For the moment though, I don't care whether or not you replace the quoted statement with anything; I'd rather just not have to see that it's still there, for my sanity's sake.

I feel as though there's a continuity issue here too, within the bio itself. The Honorstar Garrison Raid was an extremely chaotic battle; realistically speaking, everyone would be too busy fighting for their own lives to pay much attention to one lone guy's mad sniping. What you could do is have your guy had sniped off who he could in the fight, bailed upon spotting the reinforcements and later chanced upon the other survivors as he entered the tavern, using that opportunity to offer his help instead. That should fix the continuity issue I'm getting here, hopefully without interfering with what you wanted.


@ColouredCyan You certainly have the interesting character in the making. If not for the few things here and there, I'd be more than happy to accept it.

Re-Appropriator is not a crew role that I had thought of; I'd just assumed that the cat burglar aspect was something Nami did on the side, prior to officially joining the Straw Hats. Unfortunately, Re-Appropriator is also not a crew role that's on the list. I'll need a moment to consider how such a role would actually help the Sea Reaver Pirates overall, niche applications aside.

Judging from what you've written for the field itself, I'd class Poppy's combat role as a Corsair. They're more focused on quick-draws and rapid shooting than lining up their shots. You can always transfer what you've written in the Combat Role field to the Fighting Style field on the off-chance you wanna save it, but I'll leave that up to you.



That's all for now. I'll establish a due date for apps to be completed when I've finished setting things up.
What do you really want in a fighting style. I mean, I thought sniping is how a sniper fights, but maybe I have a couple of ideas.


Well, it is, but the other guys aren't just gonna sit there and let the sniper pick them off for free. They can easily spot where said sniper is shooting from and deploy counter-snipers (if they have any), or have an ambush set up outside his line of fire, just as examples of counter-measures they can use against him. I'd start with mentioning how your guy handles enemies that draw too close to him.

In saying that, I'll look at what you've done in a second. I've still got things to set up here and there, so bear with me. Speaking of...

@Duthguy@malmshodes@Stern Algorithm@Squashedquatch@ColouredCyan@FatPrincess

Discord server is now up and running. Link's up at the 0th post. Since I can, I'll throw BC an actual DM and see if he's still interested. I'd rather minimize the number of @'s I toss around here if I can.


Gonna work on this, just submitting it so It doesn't disappear!


Yeah... I get that this is a WIP, but there are already glaring problems with it.

...

I'll address the fact that you put Sniper in both roles first. If you want your guy to strictly be there as a sniper (which I'm guessing you do), then your crew role would be Enforcer. Just so you know, the Enforcers are the primary combatants of a crew, and they're there to engage the enemy, protect the rest of the crew etc.; in other words, they're pretty much the muscle.

I won't harp too much on the fact that you also just put Sniping in the Fighting Style segment cause that does scream placeholder, although I will say that if you don't expect your guy to fight all that differently from the usual sniper, you might be better off removing the field in its entirety.

...

The second issue is your mention of Portgas D. Ace. I'm not sure how I feel about canon characters even being referenced in a cursory manner, and I'm certainly against the idea of them being personally interacted with. I'd suggest removing all mention of Ace just to be safe :/

...

That's all for now. If you need any help, just ask
Is this still open?


Certainly; feel free to start an app at your earliest convenience :]

...

Also, looks good @Stern Algorithm. Go ahead and toss that into Char section and I'll update when I get the chance
I feel like I need this to be a more productive post instead it just there to bump, so...

@BCTheEntity@FatPrincess@Stern Algorithm@Duthguy

What do you guys think about me making a Discord server for this? I can always put one together if enough of you want it.
Up to you, really. Although since you asked, I'll list all the available crew roles again from most important (top) to least important (bottom)

Doctor
Shipwright
Engineer
Navigator
Cook
Helmsman
Entertainer
Swabbie
Enforcer

The Swabbies and the Enforcers in particular could be apped for multiple times if you guys really wanted to do so, but I'm imagining rather reserve the more unique roles while they're still available. I'll update the list of reservations on the 0th post as you make them.
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet