BlazingBark
Snowdrops
BrokenPromise
rabidbacon
Tlaloc
Chronic
Lildear18
Lugubrious
Mae
Shin Ghost Note"Y-Yes Papa, I couldn't believe it myself!" On her way back to her gym, Bianca was stuck in a phone call with her flabbergasted father. Looks like he finally got her messages. "Hybrid and these Shadow Pokemon, whoever these people are that attacked Postwick and one of the labs, they're pulling out all the stops for Arceus-knows-what! ...Yes, Iris is alright. The only one of us who got badly injured was Lazuli, and that was just a nasty hit to his wing. Might let Orpheus visit to keep him company." She told him as she walked up to the front door.
"Everything alright where you're at? ....I see. Hopefully the press hasn't tried to pry any information out of you guys. ...They haven't? Thank goodness. I'll keep you updated. ...Hehe, alright Papa, love you. If Mother calls, tell her I said hi!"
As the door cracked open Sloan twisted her head around from where she had Adiva trapped in a headlock, one of her taloned hands pulled backwards and pinned between them, the Blaziken squawking angrily in protest. "Hey! Bianca!" She called out to her gym mate, pulling Adiva around so that she wasn't craning her head backwards, earning another squawk. "What the hell happened? I'm gone for less than a month in Kalos with my dad and everything goes straight to shit?" She'd seen the sporadic updates on the news, obviously those had been beyond unhelpful, and the texts in their group chats, but it didn't fully explain anything either. Wasn't like she could attend the meetings either given she was out of the country.
When a talon tapped twice on her arm she let Adiva free who immediately punched her in the shoulder. She rolled her eyes at the unruly Pokémon before waving her off and crossing her arms. She lifted a finger against her arm as she spoke for each thing said, "Ryker is gone, there were attacks on both Postwick and Wyndon with some freaky Pokémon, and the challenge is still going despite all this." It was the off season for her there should not be this many problems that required her attention.
"Y-Yeah. Holly was kidnapped t-too." Bianca frowned as she walked over to Sloan. "We haven't e-even heard a thing from t-the police." She pulled out her phone and brought up the Nido-Arcanine photo, passing it to her. "It all has t-to be connected somehow..."
A heavy, exasperated groan tore from her mouth and she tipped her head back to stare at the ceiling of the gym. "I reiterate, what the hell," she threw her hands up in the air. First Ryker, now Holly, and who knew what other problems were stated in the meetings she'd missed. She glanced down at the phone that was offered and took it. Her brow furrowed in confusion at the strange looking Pokémon on the screen. She'd never seen anything like them before, well she had, but not in a singular Pokémon. "So what's the Chairman doing about all this?" She asked as she handed the phone back.
"L-Leaving it to the police? He did say he P-Professor Hawthorne was reaching out to experts about these Shadow Pokemon, b-but Fiona knows more a-about them than me." Bianca crossed her arms.
"Well that's stupid." Sloan knew that Hyacinth was an uptight ass about a lot of things, but he was seriously just leaving it to the police? They were useless on their best days, and based on what she'd seen and heard they hadn't found anything. "So the plan is just to sit around with out thumbs up our asses, while the police run around like Combusken with their heads cut off?" She couldn't stand the thought of doing nothing and more of their friends getting hurt, or worse.
Bianca shrugged. "Just g-gotta keep an eye out f-for each other, make sure no one else c-comes to harm."
Sloan sighed, "Yeah I guess," she recrossed her arms with a sigh, "Well, what're your plans for the rest of the day then?"
"Finish up here and h-head home, I guess." Bianca tilted her head. "U-Unless you have anything in mind?"
"Not really," Sloan shrugged, "Unless you want to hang out and try to get our minds off all this garbage going on." She grinned brightly at the ice type trainer, "There's this shitty movie that I found on DVD about a guy who was resurrected and forced to be an assassin. From what I've heard it's one of the worst films in years." She'd already burned herself out training and if the Chairman wanted them to keep an eye on each other, well, they were overdue for a bad movie night anyway. "If it's really bad we can force some of the others to watch it."
"One of the worst, huh? I-I'll be the judge of that." Bianca said with a knowing smile. It was tradition for the two at this point to have movie nights once in a while. Especially if the movies happen to suck ass. She's been meaning to find the time to gather everyone for a night, but recent events had screwed that up. And admittedly, it'll be funny as hell to see their reactions.
"Got everything s-set up upstairs?" She asked.
The grin widened and Bianca was given a nod, "Of course, who do you take me for?" The questions was rhetorical and Sloan didn't wait for an answer. She whistled for Adiva who had wandered over to the training side of the gym to beat on one of the punching bags set up. The fire type, despite the clawed hands, was great to cuddle with for heat. "Just gotta grab the snacks and drinks, but that'll only take a second if you want to get the TV turned on."
She took the stairs two at a time, followed swiftly by Adiva who was not about to miss out on a movie night. She skirted down the hallway to the breakroom where she had stashed a multitude of snacks and drinks. Popcorn, chips, and candy of various kinds were piled into Adiva's hands. Thankfully she'd had the wherewithal to put some of the drinks in the fridge; snatching what she could carry she wandered at a much slower pace back towards the room that housed their (mostly hers) terrible movie collection.
Bianca had followed behind them to set up the TV in the break room. (Or was it more of a lounge? Eh.) "Just gotta t-tinker around with a doodad or two and....there we go! R-Ready when you are!" She called out to Sloan.
"Almost there!" She called back as familiar sound of the TV turning on hit her ears. She stepped as quickly as she dared with the stack of drinks into the lounge and deposited them on one of the tables. Adiva followed suit with the snacks and looked pleased with herself that none of them had fallen on the way over.
It took a second of digging in the bag she had left on one of the chairs to find the disc. She pulled it free with an "Aha!" to smack it into the DVD player and plop down onto the couch. "I didn't do much looking into this movie other than seeing that it was on the list of the top 50 worst marital arts movies," she told Bianca; leaning forward to grab a bag of chips. "So we're both going in blind here."
"N-Not to worry, just makes this even more f-fun!" The ice type trainer grabbed a chocolate bar at random from the snack pile and sat down next to her. "After all, s-seeing this first means we h-have the power of spoiling it for the others." She let out a mischevious snicker.
Though the faint sound of shuffling and the funny feeling of a presence behind her caught her attention, she turned her head around to see-
Oh. It's just Mister, trying to climb over from behind them. Guess he wants in on this too. Bianca comically blinked, picking the Mr. Rime up with a straight face and sitting him down on the other side of their seating arrangements.
"You're evil," Sloan teased as she leaned back against the cushions. Adiva had settled to her left and was serving as a large, bird-shaped furnace, they were in the ice gym after all. They had barely gotten past the beginning of the movie where the main character got resurrected by a blind martial arts master when a strange, if familiar, chill ran down her spine. When Mister had arrived, or even escaped his pokeball, she had no idea. Still, she snickered at the lack of movement from the Mr. Rime as he was moved around.
They were maybe, maybe, ten minutes into the movie and Sloan already had very little idea what was going on. She had already opened a second bag of chips, occasionally forking them over to Advia. "Does it seem kind of weird to you that this type of martial arts gives them precognition and the ability to raise the dead?" She gestured to the TV with a chip, "Like, what's the point of being an assassin if you can also raise the dead?"
"Build an undead army." Bianca suggested. "T-Think about it. Kill enough dudes, specifically ones that can fight o-on the same level as you, and you can lead a zombie army t-to like, overthrow a king or something."
"Hmm, I suppose," she tapped her chin with a chip, "Why stop at just a king though? You could take over the world with powers like that." They hadn't even really gotten to any of the actual marital arts, aside from a blurry montage of the main character learning how to raise the dead or whatever. Of course the guy got kicked out of training because of pent up rage at the death of their mother (when was any of that mentioned?) and really left to become an assassin.
As the film continued and finally a contract was introduced that involved going to some resort and hanging around for a few days. Only after that would they be told who the targets were, which was just stupid. The moment that the kid and obviously single parent were introduced though Sloan threw up her hands, "This better not turn into some sappy romance movie. I wanna see dudes get their necks snapped not a dinner date."
"Nah, there's definitely gonna be some romance. There's a-always a love interest in action movies." Bianca commented, sharing a large bag of pretzels with a bored-looking Mister. "Maybe something happens to the kid? I h-hope not."
"Ugh." Always had to ruin a movie with a weird, shoved in side romance. She narrowed her eyes and immediately pegged this movie for what it was going for, "I bet you the kid is gonna be one of the targets." There was no way that they wouldn't pull some stupid tropey shit like that. It took very little time for that theory to be confirmed, "Ha! Called it!"
Bianca blinked in disbelief, narrowing her eyes as she leaned further towards the TV. "...What the actual fuck." She'd flinch when Mister lightly smacked the back of her head with his cane. Her head snapped back at the pokemon, who was giving her a reprimanding look. Language, Bianca! "Oh, like you don't think this is nonsensical!"
A sharp bark of laughter lightly startled Adiva as Sloan reveled in the fact that this shitty film had gotten Bianca of all people to swear. She'd count that as a major success. "It is and we haven't even gotten halfway through it," she said; checking her phone for the time. Unsurprisingly, to Sloan at least, both the kid and the love interest were the targets and the main character let them go. "Well now this is going to cause some problems," Sloan muttered quietly.
Suffice to say the guy who issued the contract was not happy and sent another group of assassins to collect "The Treasure" which was, unsurprisingly again, the kid. Sloan almost choked on her drink when it was said that one of the assassins was named Typhoid of all fucking things. "Ok who is this dude that they're hiding out with and why is he sacrificing himself for these people?" She resisted the urge to throw something at the TV as this random guy died to the assassins in probably one of the most poorly choreographed fight scenes she'd ever seen.
So bad in fact, that Mister sat up and made booing motions at the TV. He's seen, nay, been in battles more interesting than this trash-heap!
"Think they s-shoehorned 'em in just for the tension. Is the kid some s-sorta weapon though? Or artifical life, or something?"
"Thank you Mister!" Sloan agreed wholeheartedly with the booing and even Adiva, who could handle the worst movies out there, looked disgusted. "Man, I dunno," she said, once again flopping back into the cushions. She was going to mess up her back with all this rapid sitting up to complain. For whatever reason the dude that died had a secret passage into the orchard out the back of his house where the main character escaped with the kid and love interest. Clearly the sacrifice bought them very little time as the assassins showed up in the orchard.
She expected their main guy to be able to take out an assassin, but when the kid suddenly expressed prowess in martial arts she got tempted to throw in the towel. "What the fuck?" she whispered in a quiet, stunned disbelief as the kid and her parent killed one of the very well trained assassins with his own weapon.
A dumbfounded chuckle escaped from Bianca. "Guess that's what they mean by 'The Treasure'. Prodigy. child. Wonder what backstory they'll cough up for this. That they trained him since he could walk?" She quipped with a tinge of sarcasm.
"Better have something good or I'm gonna lose it," Sloan muttered darkly at the screen. The next ten minutes or so did not provide them with any solid backstory. Instead Typhoid gave the main guy a "Kiss of Death" (hilarious) and the old blind master had to show up and save their asses before the kid could get snatched by the assassins. In doing so confirms that the "Treasure" is someone gifted with marital arts and...that's it. They're just real good at it for no reason and the main guy is also a "Treasure" which is why their mom died.
"That's it, I can't," Sloan wanted to shove her head under a pillow but at this point it was like a train wreck, she just couldn't look away. It took every fiber of her being to not choke again laughing as the main character fucking astral projected in order to fight the leader of the other assassin group.
Bianca opened her mouth to speak, but after a brief pause she closed it and slumped down with a conceded look. "I don't even have words. Were they high when making this?!"
Meanwhile the Mr. Rime decided to just indulge himself on the snacks instead. They were much more interesting anyways.
“I wish I was high right now, it might make this more bearable,” Sloan said as she slid further down the couch into a slump. The train wreck only continued with their main guy getting their ass whooped by the leader of the assassins and nearly dying. Until the damn kid showed up again and distracted him long enough for them to escape into a…hedge maze? “Sure, anything makes sense at this point.”
The kid got caught by magical Ekans conjured by one of the other assassins in the maze; leading to the absolute worst depiction of someone getting their neck snapped in history. “They didn’t even show it! Dudes head just got yanked forward and suddenly he’s dead?!”
Bianca couldn't help laughing at the sheer absurdity at this point. "It's like they're not even hiding where they cut the budget from, bahahah!"
“At this point I’m questioning if they even had a budget,” Sloan responded through a mouthful of popcorn. Though it did seem like they were either running out of time, money, or both. In quick succession the MC finally killed the leader of the assassins, Typhoid poisoned and killed the kid, and then promptly died.
Whatever emotional impact that was meant to be there was lost on Sloan, and Adiva, since she’d mostly stopped paying attention. The resurrection thing finally came full circle though as the MC used it to bring the kid back. There was one final scene with the love interest, who Sloan had honestly forgot existed, before they all parted ways with no other fanfare.
The final scene being even more underwhelming as the master showed back up and told the MC that they “didn’t turn out so bad” before fading from existence or some other BS. “That’s seriously how they end it? Wow.”
"Well that was...some braincells I'll never get back!" Getting up from her seat, Bianca ejected the disc and carefully handed it back to Sloan. "Imagine how the others will react, it'd surely be more entertaining than the actual movie." Bianca chuckled. With the movie done and over with, Mister slid down from the couch and casually took whatever snacks they didn't eat and walked away.
“I think I can feel my brain running out of my ears,” Sloan turned to poke Adiva who had a vacant, glazed look in her eyes. The Blaziken blinked before leaning forward to snatch another bag of popcorn before Mister could wander off with all of it.
Sloan took the disc back and unceremoniously tossed the case back into her bag. “The only way I’ll watch that film again is to torture the others. They need to suffer as we have.” She watched Mister grab the rest of the snacks and wander off with amusement, “He’s gonna be bouncing off the walls if he eats all that candy.”
"Oh joy..." Bianca wryly smiled. Hopefully he was just going to put the leftovers away, but knowing the Mr. Rime, he was either going to split them with her other Pokemon, or do just that. She could already see the ensuing chaos.
"So now what? Wanna watch a better movie as a pallete cleanser?" She asked Sloan.
Sloan waved a dismissive hand, “So long as we don’t hear anything breaking.” Though there was always a chance of that. She grinned and flopped back down onto the couch, “Sounds great. Your pick this time.”
"Everything alright where you're at? ....I see. Hopefully the press hasn't tried to pry any information out of you guys. ...They haven't? Thank goodness. I'll keep you updated. ...Hehe, alright Papa, love you. If Mother calls, tell her I said hi!"
As the door cracked open Sloan twisted her head around from where she had Adiva trapped in a headlock, one of her taloned hands pulled backwards and pinned between them, the Blaziken squawking angrily in protest. "Hey! Bianca!" She called out to her gym mate, pulling Adiva around so that she wasn't craning her head backwards, earning another squawk. "What the hell happened? I'm gone for less than a month in Kalos with my dad and everything goes straight to shit?" She'd seen the sporadic updates on the news, obviously those had been beyond unhelpful, and the texts in their group chats, but it didn't fully explain anything either. Wasn't like she could attend the meetings either given she was out of the country.
When a talon tapped twice on her arm she let Adiva free who immediately punched her in the shoulder. She rolled her eyes at the unruly Pokémon before waving her off and crossing her arms. She lifted a finger against her arm as she spoke for each thing said, "Ryker is gone, there were attacks on both Postwick and Wyndon with some freaky Pokémon, and the challenge is still going despite all this." It was the off season for her there should not be this many problems that required her attention.
"Y-Yeah. Holly was kidnapped t-too." Bianca frowned as she walked over to Sloan. "We haven't e-even heard a thing from t-the police." She pulled out her phone and brought up the Nido-Arcanine photo, passing it to her. "It all has t-to be connected somehow..."
A heavy, exasperated groan tore from her mouth and she tipped her head back to stare at the ceiling of the gym. "I reiterate, what the hell," she threw her hands up in the air. First Ryker, now Holly, and who knew what other problems were stated in the meetings she'd missed. She glanced down at the phone that was offered and took it. Her brow furrowed in confusion at the strange looking Pokémon on the screen. She'd never seen anything like them before, well she had, but not in a singular Pokémon. "So what's the Chairman doing about all this?" She asked as she handed the phone back.
"L-Leaving it to the police? He did say he P-Professor Hawthorne was reaching out to experts about these Shadow Pokemon, b-but Fiona knows more a-about them than me." Bianca crossed her arms.
"Well that's stupid." Sloan knew that Hyacinth was an uptight ass about a lot of things, but he was seriously just leaving it to the police? They were useless on their best days, and based on what she'd seen and heard they hadn't found anything. "So the plan is just to sit around with out thumbs up our asses, while the police run around like Combusken with their heads cut off?" She couldn't stand the thought of doing nothing and more of their friends getting hurt, or worse.
Bianca shrugged. "Just g-gotta keep an eye out f-for each other, make sure no one else c-comes to harm."
Sloan sighed, "Yeah I guess," she recrossed her arms with a sigh, "Well, what're your plans for the rest of the day then?"
"Finish up here and h-head home, I guess." Bianca tilted her head. "U-Unless you have anything in mind?"
"Not really," Sloan shrugged, "Unless you want to hang out and try to get our minds off all this garbage going on." She grinned brightly at the ice type trainer, "There's this shitty movie that I found on DVD about a guy who was resurrected and forced to be an assassin. From what I've heard it's one of the worst films in years." She'd already burned herself out training and if the Chairman wanted them to keep an eye on each other, well, they were overdue for a bad movie night anyway. "If it's really bad we can force some of the others to watch it."
"One of the worst, huh? I-I'll be the judge of that." Bianca said with a knowing smile. It was tradition for the two at this point to have movie nights once in a while. Especially if the movies happen to suck ass. She's been meaning to find the time to gather everyone for a night, but recent events had screwed that up. And admittedly, it'll be funny as hell to see their reactions.
"Got everything s-set up upstairs?" She asked.
The grin widened and Bianca was given a nod, "Of course, who do you take me for?" The questions was rhetorical and Sloan didn't wait for an answer. She whistled for Adiva who had wandered over to the training side of the gym to beat on one of the punching bags set up. The fire type, despite the clawed hands, was great to cuddle with for heat. "Just gotta grab the snacks and drinks, but that'll only take a second if you want to get the TV turned on."
She took the stairs two at a time, followed swiftly by Adiva who was not about to miss out on a movie night. She skirted down the hallway to the breakroom where she had stashed a multitude of snacks and drinks. Popcorn, chips, and candy of various kinds were piled into Adiva's hands. Thankfully she'd had the wherewithal to put some of the drinks in the fridge; snatching what she could carry she wandered at a much slower pace back towards the room that housed their (mostly hers) terrible movie collection.
Bianca had followed behind them to set up the TV in the break room. (Or was it more of a lounge? Eh.) "Just gotta t-tinker around with a doodad or two and....there we go! R-Ready when you are!" She called out to Sloan.
"Almost there!" She called back as familiar sound of the TV turning on hit her ears. She stepped as quickly as she dared with the stack of drinks into the lounge and deposited them on one of the tables. Adiva followed suit with the snacks and looked pleased with herself that none of them had fallen on the way over.
It took a second of digging in the bag she had left on one of the chairs to find the disc. She pulled it free with an "Aha!" to smack it into the DVD player and plop down onto the couch. "I didn't do much looking into this movie other than seeing that it was on the list of the top 50 worst marital arts movies," she told Bianca; leaning forward to grab a bag of chips. "So we're both going in blind here."
"N-Not to worry, just makes this even more f-fun!" The ice type trainer grabbed a chocolate bar at random from the snack pile and sat down next to her. "After all, s-seeing this first means we h-have the power of spoiling it for the others." She let out a mischevious snicker.
Though the faint sound of shuffling and the funny feeling of a presence behind her caught her attention, she turned her head around to see-
Oh. It's just Mister, trying to climb over from behind them. Guess he wants in on this too. Bianca comically blinked, picking the Mr. Rime up with a straight face and sitting him down on the other side of their seating arrangements.
"You're evil," Sloan teased as she leaned back against the cushions. Adiva had settled to her left and was serving as a large, bird-shaped furnace, they were in the ice gym after all. They had barely gotten past the beginning of the movie where the main character got resurrected by a blind martial arts master when a strange, if familiar, chill ran down her spine. When Mister had arrived, or even escaped his pokeball, she had no idea. Still, she snickered at the lack of movement from the Mr. Rime as he was moved around.
They were maybe, maybe, ten minutes into the movie and Sloan already had very little idea what was going on. She had already opened a second bag of chips, occasionally forking them over to Advia. "Does it seem kind of weird to you that this type of martial arts gives them precognition and the ability to raise the dead?" She gestured to the TV with a chip, "Like, what's the point of being an assassin if you can also raise the dead?"
"Build an undead army." Bianca suggested. "T-Think about it. Kill enough dudes, specifically ones that can fight o-on the same level as you, and you can lead a zombie army t-to like, overthrow a king or something."
"Hmm, I suppose," she tapped her chin with a chip, "Why stop at just a king though? You could take over the world with powers like that." They hadn't even really gotten to any of the actual marital arts, aside from a blurry montage of the main character learning how to raise the dead or whatever. Of course the guy got kicked out of training because of pent up rage at the death of their mother (when was any of that mentioned?) and really left to become an assassin.
As the film continued and finally a contract was introduced that involved going to some resort and hanging around for a few days. Only after that would they be told who the targets were, which was just stupid. The moment that the kid and obviously single parent were introduced though Sloan threw up her hands, "This better not turn into some sappy romance movie. I wanna see dudes get their necks snapped not a dinner date."
"Nah, there's definitely gonna be some romance. There's a-always a love interest in action movies." Bianca commented, sharing a large bag of pretzels with a bored-looking Mister. "Maybe something happens to the kid? I h-hope not."
"Ugh." Always had to ruin a movie with a weird, shoved in side romance. She narrowed her eyes and immediately pegged this movie for what it was going for, "I bet you the kid is gonna be one of the targets." There was no way that they wouldn't pull some stupid tropey shit like that. It took very little time for that theory to be confirmed, "Ha! Called it!"
Bianca blinked in disbelief, narrowing her eyes as she leaned further towards the TV. "...What the actual fuck." She'd flinch when Mister lightly smacked the back of her head with his cane. Her head snapped back at the pokemon, who was giving her a reprimanding look. Language, Bianca! "Oh, like you don't think this is nonsensical!"
A sharp bark of laughter lightly startled Adiva as Sloan reveled in the fact that this shitty film had gotten Bianca of all people to swear. She'd count that as a major success. "It is and we haven't even gotten halfway through it," she said; checking her phone for the time. Unsurprisingly, to Sloan at least, both the kid and the love interest were the targets and the main character let them go. "Well now this is going to cause some problems," Sloan muttered quietly.
Suffice to say the guy who issued the contract was not happy and sent another group of assassins to collect "The Treasure" which was, unsurprisingly again, the kid. Sloan almost choked on her drink when it was said that one of the assassins was named Typhoid of all fucking things. "Ok who is this dude that they're hiding out with and why is he sacrificing himself for these people?" She resisted the urge to throw something at the TV as this random guy died to the assassins in probably one of the most poorly choreographed fight scenes she'd ever seen.
So bad in fact, that Mister sat up and made booing motions at the TV. He's seen, nay, been in battles more interesting than this trash-heap!
"Think they s-shoehorned 'em in just for the tension. Is the kid some s-sorta weapon though? Or artifical life, or something?"
"Thank you Mister!" Sloan agreed wholeheartedly with the booing and even Adiva, who could handle the worst movies out there, looked disgusted. "Man, I dunno," she said, once again flopping back into the cushions. She was going to mess up her back with all this rapid sitting up to complain. For whatever reason the dude that died had a secret passage into the orchard out the back of his house where the main character escaped with the kid and love interest. Clearly the sacrifice bought them very little time as the assassins showed up in the orchard.
She expected their main guy to be able to take out an assassin, but when the kid suddenly expressed prowess in martial arts she got tempted to throw in the towel. "What the fuck?" she whispered in a quiet, stunned disbelief as the kid and her parent killed one of the very well trained assassins with his own weapon.
A dumbfounded chuckle escaped from Bianca. "Guess that's what they mean by 'The Treasure'. Prodigy. child. Wonder what backstory they'll cough up for this. That they trained him since he could walk?" She quipped with a tinge of sarcasm.
"Better have something good or I'm gonna lose it," Sloan muttered darkly at the screen. The next ten minutes or so did not provide them with any solid backstory. Instead Typhoid gave the main guy a "Kiss of Death" (hilarious) and the old blind master had to show up and save their asses before the kid could get snatched by the assassins. In doing so confirms that the "Treasure" is someone gifted with marital arts and...that's it. They're just real good at it for no reason and the main guy is also a "Treasure" which is why their mom died.
"That's it, I can't," Sloan wanted to shove her head under a pillow but at this point it was like a train wreck, she just couldn't look away. It took every fiber of her being to not choke again laughing as the main character fucking astral projected in order to fight the leader of the other assassin group.
Bianca opened her mouth to speak, but after a brief pause she closed it and slumped down with a conceded look. "I don't even have words. Were they high when making this?!"
Meanwhile the Mr. Rime decided to just indulge himself on the snacks instead. They were much more interesting anyways.
“I wish I was high right now, it might make this more bearable,” Sloan said as she slid further down the couch into a slump. The train wreck only continued with their main guy getting their ass whooped by the leader of the assassins and nearly dying. Until the damn kid showed up again and distracted him long enough for them to escape into a…hedge maze? “Sure, anything makes sense at this point.”
The kid got caught by magical Ekans conjured by one of the other assassins in the maze; leading to the absolute worst depiction of someone getting their neck snapped in history. “They didn’t even show it! Dudes head just got yanked forward and suddenly he’s dead?!”
Bianca couldn't help laughing at the sheer absurdity at this point. "It's like they're not even hiding where they cut the budget from, bahahah!"
“At this point I’m questioning if they even had a budget,” Sloan responded through a mouthful of popcorn. Though it did seem like they were either running out of time, money, or both. In quick succession the MC finally killed the leader of the assassins, Typhoid poisoned and killed the kid, and then promptly died.
Whatever emotional impact that was meant to be there was lost on Sloan, and Adiva, since she’d mostly stopped paying attention. The resurrection thing finally came full circle though as the MC used it to bring the kid back. There was one final scene with the love interest, who Sloan had honestly forgot existed, before they all parted ways with no other fanfare.
The final scene being even more underwhelming as the master showed back up and told the MC that they “didn’t turn out so bad” before fading from existence or some other BS. “That’s seriously how they end it? Wow.”
"Well that was...some braincells I'll never get back!" Getting up from her seat, Bianca ejected the disc and carefully handed it back to Sloan. "Imagine how the others will react, it'd surely be more entertaining than the actual movie." Bianca chuckled. With the movie done and over with, Mister slid down from the couch and casually took whatever snacks they didn't eat and walked away.
“I think I can feel my brain running out of my ears,” Sloan turned to poke Adiva who had a vacant, glazed look in her eyes. The Blaziken blinked before leaning forward to snatch another bag of popcorn before Mister could wander off with all of it.
Sloan took the disc back and unceremoniously tossed the case back into her bag. “The only way I’ll watch that film again is to torture the others. They need to suffer as we have.” She watched Mister grab the rest of the snacks and wander off with amusement, “He’s gonna be bouncing off the walls if he eats all that candy.”
"Oh joy..." Bianca wryly smiled. Hopefully he was just going to put the leftovers away, but knowing the Mr. Rime, he was either going to split them with her other Pokemon, or do just that. She could already see the ensuing chaos.
"So now what? Wanna watch a better movie as a pallete cleanser?" She asked Sloan.
Sloan waved a dismissive hand, “So long as we don’t hear anything breaking.” Though there was always a chance of that. She grinned and flopped back down onto the couch, “Sounds great. Your pick this time.”
