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Very well, where do I begin?

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.

Most Recent Posts

Damian wasn't a clone. He was a genetically engineered and scientifically perfected fetus that still required Bruce and Talia to make the dirty to create.

Totally different.
Oh, okay. I see how it is. I guess I can play this game of "stealing other peoples' mythos" too!

Y'all are gonna regret this when I start the Bat-Clone Saga! And the Bat-Symbiote Saga! And have Bruce adopt, like, five different costumed identities for some contrived reason!

Ten points to HenryJones for namedropping Big McLargeHuge.


Uh, I'll have you know, he referenced Smoke Manmuscle. Sir.
Also featured is "Stupid high school kids do stupid things while overly emotional", aka the Spidey story


Calling it now...

Everything ends up very nice for the two crazy kids and absolutely nothing tragic or dramatic happens to seperate them or cause some sort of friction. They eventually get hitched, Gwen never fights crime again, and the two live happily ever after.

Am I good or am I good?
(If need be I'll throw up my sample as my second post to keep a hold of GA. Getting dangerously close to that two week mark.)


I might definitely do that, if I were you. The Weekly Post Check is coming up tomorrow and there are a few more on it, this time...
<Snipped quote by Master Bruce>

Right, nobody has time for that.

*frantically burns work in progress textbook on the Question's history both in the comics and behind the scenes*


Well, we all gotta have our exceptions. I intend to embark on a massive quest next year for Batman's 80th to read every issue of Batman and Detective Comics ontop of rewatching all the movies, every cartoon, replaying most of the games...

I may not live through the experience.
Look, if Jimmy Olsen doesn't turn into at least one Kaiju this season, you can forget being accepted for Year Two.
This is why I pretty much ignore canon altogether and treat the A-list superheroes (Superman, Spider-Man, Batman, and maybe one or two others) like a buffet. Comics, movies, cartoons, etc, I just pick up the things I like, leave the things I don't, and whatever ends up on my plate by the time I sit at the table is 'canon' to me. That's more or less what you have to do to avoid going insane.


Pretty much every character I've ever played has been that. They're all "The Movie/Cartoon/Game/This Select Batch Of Comics" version that I like. I could theoretically do extensive research or know a character's history by heart, but ain't nobody got time for that.

Psh. You'll have to do a similar treatment for Spider-Man and/or Superman as you did for Batman before you get that.

Like, buy a gal some dinner, first, gawd.


Spider-Man's history is so convoluted that you might aswell throw in the towel right now. I'd probably outright skip the 80's and 90's.

Superman's is pretty zigzagged too, given all the various retcons and Electric Supermen and the entirety of the Silver Age being batshit insane and such.
Look, I can't be expected to remember characters that are called by Demon and characters who are called by Devil. There are too damn many of those in comics.

Now someone apply for Daredemon so I can stop being tempted to cheat and apply for him myself under a second account! I have an arc already lined up where he fights Speed Devil!
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