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Carlyle
The Otter
ASDAValueMilk
Bacon
Crimson Flame
Simple Unicycle
ColdAtlas
Autumn Moon
Roman
Duncan, eloquent as ever, had only one thing to say to say to his bespectacled compatriot's announcement;
"...You're shitting me, right?" The bald man deadpanned with a cocked brow, clearly somewhere between annoyed and amused, as he stepped clear of the door and set down his things "We spend an entire night running around like idiots looking for this kid because we think she's in trouble, and a month later she just waltzes into an alley, very much not dead, beside our drinking hole? That's the kinda shit some lonely preteen writes about while hopped up on Mountain Dew and anime while scrolling through all the weird places on the internet."
Taking a brief pause to calmly exhale and swallow how stupid that all sounded, Duncan raised his other arm and deftly handed Avery his travel kit and staff, before dusting him off quickly with the same and very subtly giving him a once-over to make sure the lad hadn't smacked his head off of something without him noticing and given himself a concussion.
One day, the baldy hoped, he'd be able to attribute the young trap's antics to a smack on the noggin.
But today was clearly not that day.
"Ok, Fancypants..." The Canuck began with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and completely (hilariously) oblivious to the 'Tired Dad' tone of his own voice as he enunciated his point with a slight chopping motion of his free hand "...There's 'Excited', and then there's 'jumping off the roof of a building and attacking someone with an overly-affectionate puppy.' Do you just... hate stairs or something?"
Before Duncan could get any more digs in at said Lad of the Pants Most Fancy, some drunk guy showed up and started babbling about Earth. And hovering just a liiitle bit close to their lost and found Japanese Schoolgirl and petting the puppy as it doubled-down on it's saliva-and-joy filled assault on her face.
That got his attention, and he took a step forward as Ease told the man to back up, hand raised in a placating gesture; as a Mountie, a surprisingly significant part of the bald man's career had revolved around handling drunks, so this wasn't exactly untrodden ground for him.
"Alright, Bud. Gonna need ya ta back up just a bi-"
And he was immediately cut off as some... cloaked figure suddenly came out of nowhere, wordlessly grabbed said drunk, pinned him to a wall and started filling him with body shots.
'Okay... what?'
Wordlessly raising a brow at that and shooting a glance at both Avery and Ease, before quietly walking over to the still-pinned Aya, picking the dog off her and plucking her off the ground while still keeping an eye on... whatever the fuck it was that was happening right now.
The cloak slipped a little; apparently our mystery beating-dispenser was some kind of lizard... person...
'What?'
Looking away to give Aya a once-over to make sure she didn't hurt herself falling or something as he placed her back down on her feet and handing her back a pair of (now slightly dusty) apples he'd assumed she'd dropped, he looked back again as he put the pupper down and found... a lot of exposed skin... and a tail... and wings...
And jiggling.
Lots of jiggling.
Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball levels of jiggling.
'What?'
Eyes darting between the rest of the alley's occupants as if to silently make sure he wasn't the only one seeing this half-naked dragon-lady beating on a drunk, the former Mountie brought his hand up to his mouth and loudly cleared his throat, making sure he was standing between this buxom, scaly boxer and Aya as he did so.
"Uhh... Ma'am? I think ye've got 'im. Hell, I think you had him five minutes ago." Duncan finally stated, tone neutral, though a tiny edge of humour shone through as he spoke "...You could probably stop now."