@Dasheon: I'd revisit your concepts for abilities, because creating technology doesn't really suit a magical girl.
VitaVitaAR
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King of Knights
STATUS: I think watching fight scenes can help in general terms with writing combat, since it can give you an idea of flow and choreography. 2 yrs ago
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I think watching fight scenes can help in general terms with writing combat, since it can give you an idea of flow and choreography.
2 yrs ago
At least if you're writing something you know, with knights.
2 yrs ago
I mean, depends on what you're writing, and the tone and theme of what you're writing. Trained armored knights were legitimately monstrous on the battlefield, so looking up how they fought helps.
2 yrs ago
As much as there's a lot of reasons twitter sucks, I genuinely don't want to see it die for the sake of all the artists who now rely on it. Hoping the shithead stops trying to directly administrate.
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2 yrs ago
roleplayerguild.com/posts/5… If anyone's up for fighting some kaiju, why not try out my new RP, Godzilla: YATAGARUSU?
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Urban Starlight Wonderland: Tokyo Stardust, a team-based magical girl RP!
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2 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Roleplay
Honestly I should really sit down and update the OP at some point.
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Urban Starlight Wonderland: Tokyo Stardust, a team-based magical girl RP!
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2 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Roleplay
@Dasheon: Okay haven't properly looked at the rest of her bio yet, just her abilities.
But honestly I don't think this works. Not because the Archetype is a bad choice or anything, but because her ability set is pretty unfitting for it. I'm not sure where the custom made tools come in, and the training isn't really relevant. She's already a magical girl, the training comes afterwards to hone her abilities and figure out her Archetype.
As for said Archetype, rather then punching I'd expect Athena to be far more related to the actual Athena's legendary weapons and associations. For example, her spear, owls, you can easily incorporate a shield in there too. Could certainly feature something relating to the Palladion as well, which is symbolic of Athena's spear.
But honestly I don't think this works. Not because the Archetype is a bad choice or anything, but because her ability set is pretty unfitting for it. I'm not sure where the custom made tools come in, and the training isn't really relevant. She's already a magical girl, the training comes afterwards to hone her abilities and figure out her Archetype.
As for said Archetype, rather then punching I'd expect Athena to be far more related to the actual Athena's legendary weapons and associations. For example, her spear, owls, you can easily incorporate a shield in there too. Could certainly feature something relating to the Palladion as well, which is symbolic of Athena's spear.
@Creative Chaos: Yes, absolutely.
@Creative Chaos: It is.
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Urban Starlight Wonderland: Tokyo Stardust, a team-based magical girl RP!
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2 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Roleplay
@King Cosmos: Accepted. Will admit I'm playing favorites a little but since you're a returning player from the last iteration I feel like you get considered first.
@Dasheon: You don't have to change, but since it's a team-based RP you might want to swap powersets? Sorry, returning player and all just kind of felt like I should look at their bio first. I can help with archetypes if you want, they don't necessarily have to be literal.
@Dasheon: You don't have to change, but since it's a team-based RP you might want to swap powersets? Sorry, returning player and all just kind of felt like I should look at their bio first. I can help with archetypes if you want, they don't necessarily have to be literal.
Ah, it was a familiar face. Fanilly had known Lord Velbrance when the both of them were younger, having met a few times at functions arranged between his family and her own. She recalled him being a fairly polite boy, and while she had been rather shy at the time they hadn't gotten along terribly. Even if it had been quite some time since they'd last spoken, it was nice to see someone she knew even rather distantly now. Since they hadn't spoken in so long, while it was slightly discomforting to hear him forget her title she didn't truly blame him for it.
"Ah, Lord Velbrance, it's been a long time," she said, bowing her head with a smile on her face as she spoke. "I-"
She faltered when he continued to speak, breath hitching as Velbrance mentioned the death of Sir Rickert. His family... Fanilly knew he was a father. The news was surely devastating for his wife and child. She'd barely even known him, but Sir Ricket had swiftly proven himself to be an honorable and just knight even in her short experience with him as his Knight-Captain.
"... I wish I could take his death back," she said, finally, her tone considerably more morose, "He shouldn't have died."
She recalled Sir Renar's words from the previous night. While she wanted to prevent anyone under her command from dying, at the very least he had died fighting for Thaln's people. In the name of bravery and compassion. It didn't make it any less painful that he had died under her command, but at least he had died for what he believed in.
"I... I made the arrangements for his family as soon as I could," she continued, fingers clenching slightly at her sides, gaze downcast, "I must, I must make sure they are given the honors they deserve, as the family of a brave knight. It's all I can do."
@Raineh Daze
"Ah, Lord Velbrance, it's been a long time," she said, bowing her head with a smile on her face as she spoke. "I-"
She faltered when he continued to speak, breath hitching as Velbrance mentioned the death of Sir Rickert. His family... Fanilly knew he was a father. The news was surely devastating for his wife and child. She'd barely even known him, but Sir Ricket had swiftly proven himself to be an honorable and just knight even in her short experience with him as his Knight-Captain.
"... I wish I could take his death back," she said, finally, her tone considerably more morose, "He shouldn't have died."
She recalled Sir Renar's words from the previous night. While she wanted to prevent anyone under her command from dying, at the very least he had died fighting for Thaln's people. In the name of bravery and compassion. It didn't make it any less painful that he had died under her command, but at least he had died for what he believed in.
"I... I made the arrangements for his family as soon as I could," she continued, fingers clenching slightly at her sides, gaze downcast, "I must, I must make sure they are given the honors they deserve, as the family of a brave knight. It's all I can do."
@Raineh Daze
In
Urban Starlight Wonderland: Tokyo Stardust, a team-based magical girl RP!
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2 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Roleplay
@Raineh Daze: Accepted.
@ImaginedBird67: The name isn't a real Japanese name or a real name in another other language.
That description is completely inadequate and you haven't given a picture to supplement. How is anyone supposed to get a good sense of how your character looks?
You removed her personality section.
Was she named for skills she would possess in the future? That explanation of her name doesn't make any sense.
Her archetype isn't valid and she doesn't have a concept. They're modeled on actual stories, mythological tales, sourced from things like that. See the examples I gave in the OP.
Her abilities are sparse and pretty much useless as a magical girl. In fact, I really don't see anything in this CS that points to her being a magical girl at all. Nothing is mentioned in backstory.
I'm sorry but I can't accept this, it's below the level of quality intended for this RP. Please look at the other bios already posted to get an idea of what I'm looking for.
@ImaginedBird67: The name isn't a real Japanese name or a real name in another other language.
That description is completely inadequate and you haven't given a picture to supplement. How is anyone supposed to get a good sense of how your character looks?
You removed her personality section.
Was she named for skills she would possess in the future? That explanation of her name doesn't make any sense.
Her archetype isn't valid and she doesn't have a concept. They're modeled on actual stories, mythological tales, sourced from things like that. See the examples I gave in the OP.
Her abilities are sparse and pretty much useless as a magical girl. In fact, I really don't see anything in this CS that points to her being a magical girl at all. Nothing is mentioned in backstory.
I'm sorry but I can't accept this, it's below the level of quality intended for this RP. Please look at the other bios already posted to get an idea of what I'm looking for.
The Cazt heir's delicate hands tensed slightly as she was pulled closer. Regardless of how sharp-edged her personality appeared, it was clear that when it came to matters of dance she was certainly unable to take the lead. But neither did she desire to appear as if she was inexperienced, regardless of the fact that she was only thirteen years old. Her manner of dancing was of one who had little practical experience. Somewhat stiff, but at the very least she'd certainly taken lessons.
And perhaps the fact that some of the other nobles disapproved did well to bolster her confidence. Indeed, after a few moments, she even cast a smirk towards the source of several whispers, a handful of nobles from the Marvorn and Denheim families.
The disapproving glares she received in return only seemed to make Veilena more eager to dance, and she grew somewhat less stiff.
The entire time, Haelstadt was watching from their position beside the window, wordlessly.
@ERode
For a moment, one could swear there was a sight of a pointed hat, likely atop a small figure, just barely glimpsed moving through a crowd. But then it was gone.
The handsome features of the Velbrance heir briefly took on a smug smirk as he sighted the Knight-Captain of the Iron Roses, his slicked-back black hair gleaming in the party light as he began to approach.
And at the far end of the hall, from deeper within the castle...
"Presenting First Princess Elisandre Tanetha Falisse, and Second Princess Maletha Hirenz Falisse!"
Surrounded by their attendants, the Princesses entered the hall. The elder of the two princesses was reknowned for her beauty, delicate features framed by her gleaming golden hair, green eyes regarding the guests before her, a smile on her face. She was no older then the Knight-Captain herself clad in a shimmering frilled dress that almost appeared to change color depending on how the light struck it. It was rumored it had originated from beyond Lethienvel, the work of an elven seamstress.
Beside her was her younger sister, who seemed somewhat less adept at the sight of the crowds. At only ten years old, she was obviously more cute then she was beautiful, her hair braided as she silently stared at the guests.
It was perhaps notable that the middle sibling, Prince Enrich, was absent.
"I am so very happy to see that all of you have come!" declared the First Princess, a bright smile on her face, "But I must admit, I am most eager to see the resplendent Iron Rose Knights, who so recently felled a grave threat to our people!"
@Raineh Daze@Rune_Alchemist@HereComesTheSnow@Saiyan@The Otter@Crimson Paladin@Psychic Loser@Richard Horthy@VahkiDane
"What the blazes are you doing, Sir Felix?!"
The angry voice of an older man carried over the crowds, booming over the sounds of the party. Striding towards the brothers was the figure of Sir Adeforth, one of the most senior captains among the Crown Knights.
His white hair and moustache were finely groomed, and though his face was lined with age his blue eyes were burning intensely, his fine dress uniform free of all wrinkles, cape flowing behind him.
"Picking a fight, bragging like some low thug, in the middle of the Princess's ball? Have you taken leave of all sense? Do you truly believe this is behavior befitting of our order?"
@Psyker Landshark
And perhaps the fact that some of the other nobles disapproved did well to bolster her confidence. Indeed, after a few moments, she even cast a smirk towards the source of several whispers, a handful of nobles from the Marvorn and Denheim families.
The disapproving glares she received in return only seemed to make Veilena more eager to dance, and she grew somewhat less stiff.
The entire time, Haelstadt was watching from their position beside the window, wordlessly.
@ERode
For a moment, one could swear there was a sight of a pointed hat, likely atop a small figure, just barely glimpsed moving through a crowd. But then it was gone.
The handsome features of the Velbrance heir briefly took on a smug smirk as he sighted the Knight-Captain of the Iron Roses, his slicked-back black hair gleaming in the party light as he began to approach.
And at the far end of the hall, from deeper within the castle...
"Presenting First Princess Elisandre Tanetha Falisse, and Second Princess Maletha Hirenz Falisse!"
Surrounded by their attendants, the Princesses entered the hall. The elder of the two princesses was reknowned for her beauty, delicate features framed by her gleaming golden hair, green eyes regarding the guests before her, a smile on her face. She was no older then the Knight-Captain herself clad in a shimmering frilled dress that almost appeared to change color depending on how the light struck it. It was rumored it had originated from beyond Lethienvel, the work of an elven seamstress.
Beside her was her younger sister, who seemed somewhat less adept at the sight of the crowds. At only ten years old, she was obviously more cute then she was beautiful, her hair braided as she silently stared at the guests.
It was perhaps notable that the middle sibling, Prince Enrich, was absent.
"I am so very happy to see that all of you have come!" declared the First Princess, a bright smile on her face, "But I must admit, I am most eager to see the resplendent Iron Rose Knights, who so recently felled a grave threat to our people!"
@Raineh Daze@Rune_Alchemist@HereComesTheSnow@Saiyan@The Otter@Crimson Paladin@Psychic Loser@Richard Horthy@VahkiDane
"What the blazes are you doing, Sir Felix?!"
The angry voice of an older man carried over the crowds, booming over the sounds of the party. Striding towards the brothers was the figure of Sir Adeforth, one of the most senior captains among the Crown Knights.
His white hair and moustache were finely groomed, and though his face was lined with age his blue eyes were burning intensely, his fine dress uniform free of all wrinkles, cape flowing behind him.
"Picking a fight, bragging like some low thug, in the middle of the Princess's ball? Have you taken leave of all sense? Do you truly believe this is behavior befitting of our order?"
@Psyker Landshark
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Urban Starlight Wonderland: Tokyo Stardust, a team-based Magical Girl RP!
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2 yrs ago
Forum: Casual Interest Checks
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