Levi bobbed and weaved through the crowd as fast as his feet would take him, sprinting towards the complete opposite side of the festival grounds to where the ferris wheel was located. Like the distracted idiot he was, he had completely lost track of time! His eyes glanced up at the sky that lit up with beautiful tones of purple and orange reflecting against the gathering clouds. How could he have forgotten?! His mind flashed back to Stella. Her brilliant smile, her mesmerizing amber eyes, those lips…
Nearly crashing into a small child, Levi spun out of the way and hopped a few times to catch his balance before taking off again.
"Sorry!" He called back to the mother who glared at him with daggers.
‘Focus, focus, focus.’ He reminded himself, expelling Stella from his thoughts. Why did that moment between them even happen?! He wasn't into Stella…. was he? Stop! He was here for Phoenix and Phoenix alone. That had been the plan all along - he needed to be there for her. His mind briefly reminded him of the image of Phoenix enjoying her time with Archer and he wondered if Phoenix would even show up at all. The suspense of it all was exciting, but he hoped she wouldn’t let him down. She rarely had in the past.
Screeching to a halt, Levi paused at a flower stand vendor who was beginning to take down their stall to make way for the night market vendors.
"How…. m-... How much?" He breathed heavily, pointing at a
small bouquet of daffodils that was still out on display. The vendor looked over the flowers and then eyed him curiously, probably wondering if they should drive the price up as high as possible since Levi appeared desperate.
“Well… They would just be getting thrown out tonight anyhow.” Mercifully, they decided not to take advantage of the situation.
“Five bucks.”Levi reached into his pocket for his wallet, his fingers instead finding Stella’s phone that she had left behind. His heart skipped a beat out of anxiety. He was worried for Stella, but he couldn’t stand Phoenix up on the “date” he had tried to set up either! He’d have to find Stella afterwards. She couldn’t go that far in this little town… right? Reaching into his other pocket, Levi pulled out his wallet and put a ten dollar bill down instead.
"Thanks." He plucked the boquet up delicately, but before taking off again, he pulled out his own cell phone and quickly pulled up Tommy’s number. The last text message that showed up on the thread was from Levi years ago, stating he’d call Tommy back when he could. For a split second he wondered if he ever did, but there was no time for that! His fingers quickly flew across the touch screen.
'Hey dude.' Send.
'Sorry, this is really random, but if you see Stella can you let me know? I have her phone.' Send
He paused, thinking if he should include the rest of the story. He opted for only one more detail.
'Her and I were drinking, but I didn’t know she was such a lightweight! Miguel told me after. She took off without her phone.' Send.
If anyone was going to find someone, it’d probably be Tommy. At least Levi hoped so - Tommy was the police after all. Batman would surely save the day! With that, Levi stuffed the phone and his wallet back into his pocket and got back to running. Luckily the ferris wheel wasn’t much further.
‘I need to go back to the gym. Too many donuts.’ He thought as he arrived at the gate surrounding the ferris wheel, completely winded. Levi’s eyes searched for Phoenix in the nearby crowd as he took a few deep breaths to try to regain his composure. As he scanned the crowd his mind became hopeful that he was the first to arrive. It had not been sunset for too long… there was still a chance! Or, maybe she had decided to stand him up. There was always that option…
Nixie had at least gotten her information to Theo who'd be calling her and setting up a commission for the painting for her moms anniversary. She tapped her foot as the sun started setting, giving off orange and violet hues that she couldn't enjoy. Disappointment after disappointment should have prepared her for this. The scent of daffodils drifted to her on the gentle breeze that lifted the stray hairs that had fallen out of her messy updo. She'd taken her turn driving the tractor on the hayride and almost regretted not bringing Jethro.
Turning toward the scent Nixie closed her eyes and smiled slightly. She fingered the hem of the cardigan which reminded her of
Lovefool by The Cardigans. Sighing she opened her eyes and she saw Levi completely winded as if he had run to not miss anything. She almost snipped at him asking how Stella was and if he'd watched her drinking because she was a
lightweight. He'd have known that if he'd been around at all when she was in college.
Levi looked like he was panicking and Nixie thought about all the times he hurt her throughout the years. She thought about the fact that she'd given Chris her phone number and how well she'd gotten on with Archie. It was a long time coming but she realized that she had options. That she was worth it. She didn't have to put up with the way Levi treated her.
She had let him hurt her. She could start to change all that at this moment.
Shaking her head Nixie realized that it wasn't something Levi could turn off or ever really change from. It was like asking a leopard to change his spots. Levi wasn't going to change so Nixie was. Now no change was made that was easy if it was worthwhile. Pulling herself out of her own head she smiled and waved at Levi a little awkwardly, her heart squeezing at how good he looked.
"Hi." She blushed a little as she inwardly chastised her fair coloring then assured herself that it will get easier. It would take time to get to the point where she could see him and her heart not squeeze.
Levi grinned as Phoenix came into view, the crowd parting in front of him as they locked eyes with one another. He waved back at her and took a few steps towards her to close the gap between her and the crowd.
"Hey." He responded, his voice low as he felt the butterflies in his stomach turn when she looked up at him and blushed. She still felt something, it was easy enough to tell by the way she looked at him. It was nice having her eyes on him in that way again. The way she had looked at him in the cafe this morning had been so cold, but this felt warm and fuzzy. Like it use to feel.
"Oh." He suddenly realized he still held something in his hand.
"For you." He offered her the daffodil bouquet , smiling at her with pride because he had remembered what her favorite flower was after all these years.
Taking the offered bouquet Nixie closed her eyes as she inhaled the crisp floral scent.
"Hummmm. Thank you." Her voice had that warm, dark, smokey and spicy quality that reminded you of an excellent cigar paired with a bourbon with a bit of a bite. She cleared her throat delicately as if she could clear that quality from her voice, but she knew better. Her voice was a smooth sexy contralto like the classy film stars of old Hollywood like Lauren Bacall, Kathrine Hepburn or Judy Garland and more recently Jennifer Lawrence, Emma Stone or Scarlett Johansson. Her voice had been labeled over the years as 'erotic enough to talk a man into climax' and 'radio worthy' but not limited to 'phone sex'. So she supposed her voice was sexy. She didn't hear it but apparently others did.
"So ummm… what's on your mind?" Nixie was going to make Levi tell her what the reason was that he wanted to talk. She'd decide what to do after she heard him out.
Levi held his smile as he watched her, happy to have made her happy. He shrugged at her question and tilted his head in the direction of the ferris wheel line.
"I just wanted to spend time with you… Let's take a ride, for old times sake." He began walking over to the front of the line and waved to a man who was running the ride.
"Derek!" He called to the blonde haired man,
"Let us through." The man looked at Levi as if he was joking. The line had at least twenty people waiting to be admitted to the ride.
“I can’t just let you cut, Lev-”
"You know you owe me, big time. I’m calling in the favor now.”The blonde man sighed heavily and nodded in agreement, opening up the chain that blocked the line of people from entering the ferris wheel.
“Fine, fine. Come on.” He waved the couple through, ignoring the looks from people in line.
"Thanks, man.” Levi patted him on the shoulder as he and Nixie walked through and onto the ferris wheel platform.
"After you.” He opened up the side door of the ferris wheel cart and gestured for her to step inside first. Once they were both seated, Levi made himself comfortable on the seat, recognizing that he felt a bit nervous now sitting shoulder to shoulder with her.
"So… how have you been? Tell me what you and Tommy have been up to.” He locked eyes with her, admiring how the sunlight reflected off of her fiery hair. In the back of his mind he reminded himself that he was clearly avoiding the “elephant in the room” conversation that he had previously planned to have with her. He’d bring it up…. eventually. It didn’t feel right to just jump straight into it. Not yet.
‘Maybe not today?’ He pondered to himself due to feeling the buzz of alcohol swirling around in his mind. He shouldn’t have drank with Stella so much before this. He might open his mouth and make things worse! Levi could hold his alcohol, but he was certainly feeling the effects.
Nixie was surprised that Levi was able to call in a favor with the line so long. He opened the cart door and had her go first. She moved over for him and as he deliberately, she decided, sat close to her. She froze as his shoulder touched hers and she felt her cheeks heat.
Wanting to sink into the ground Nixie blinked as Levi eventually caught her eye as the cart swayed with the movement of the wheel. Then he asked about Tommy. Nixie smiled slightly like a sister smiles when asked about a brother.
"Well he and I have just been palling around like usual. You know… hiking, fishing, dancing, catching a movie or two. Same old, same old. Nothing different." She sighed and looked away.
"Look about what happened before you left for college…" Gathering courage for this next part of the conversation Nixie watched a few more people get on and the wheel finally swung into full motion. She unconsciously gripped Levi’s thigh as the cart tilted and rocked more than she expected. Her breath caught and stuttered for a moment. Her left hand braced on the side of the cart fingers spread. The butterflies in her stomach that had been there since this morning when she realized Levi was back surged with vengeance.
If apprehensive had a picture next to it that picture would be Nixie. Her next words were stuck in her throat. Lodged there unmoving.
"Sorry." She'd done nothing to apologize for that night. Kitty hadn't even told her. No. Serena Clemens had taken great pains to do so.
Levi's heart jumped as Nixie went straight into the conversation he had been hoping to ease into... or possibly avoid for the day.
"Wait," He spoke to cut her off, feeling bad that it was her who had to bring it up.
"I-" He paused as the cart jarred forward and startled Phoenix, causing her to grip his thigh. His lips curled into another smirk,
"If you wanted me to take my pants off you could've just asked." He laughed, unable to stop himself even in the midst of a serious conversation. Seeing the look in her eyes shift, Levi stopped laughing and cleared his throat.
"Kidding, kidding." He smiled sheepishly at her.
'Damn alcohol...' He thought, even though he likely would have said the same thing if he was sober.
"Uhm... so...." Feeling the nerves settle in, he looked out towards the sun beginning to fall behind the surrounding mountain range as the cart slowly rose towards the top of the ferris wheel. Taking in a deep breath, he held it for a moment as his thoughts raced. For years he had went over how this conversation might go in his head. Thought about all the ways he could explain himself, justify his actions, apologize and redeem himself. However, in this moment, his mind felt frozen. He was forgetting every single excuse he had crafted. Instead, only one thing came to mind.
"I'm so sorry, Nix."Forcing himself to look away from the sunset, he locked his eyes onto her.
"I don't know what I was thinking back then, but... I'm sorry. I know it ruined something between us… I'm a fucking idiot." He frowned as he looked at her, his eyes reflecting the pain he felt inside from his own mistakes. He had royally messed something up with his entire friend group right before he left and he knew that... All for some girl he didn't really even know or necessarily care about. Kayleigh Thrasher-Jones. Phoenix's own cousin. The girl had practically thrown herself at Levi and being the young, dumb, and drunk teenager he was... he went for it. He didn't think much of it at the time, if he was honest. He and Nixie had always flirted, but it was never anything more. The one time he tried, Nixie denied him. So he figured; why would she be upset if he went somewhere else? It was dumb. He quickly found that out after Phoenix discovered what had happened.
"I hope you can forgive me… Can we start over again?""If I had asked you'd have been gone years longer this time." Nixie pulled her hand away and with the other she put them in her lap and sighed.
"Look… I had no claim on you. Just because you and I made out a few times didn't make me your girlfriend." She shrugged and looked away.
"Really I should apologize that I assumed things and technically I ignored you. You behaved true to form. I was the one who lost the plot. You are who you are and I shouldn't even want change that." Nixie looked back at Levi her emotions carefully hidden. She'd gotten quite good at presenting a fantastic poker face, it was after all part of the hustle. Not that she was hustling Levi, well perhaps she was, but not out of money…this time.
Levi asking to start over was like twisting the knife he already drove into her heart years ago. Or perhaps saying it was like a pin in a butterfly would be more appropriate an analogy. A smile pulled at Nixie's mouth.
"Starting over sounds like just the thing."Because that works for you so well. Moving on has always been so easy. I was the most hated female in school because you couldn't break up with your… flings. Tommy couldn't do it cause they'd cry so I had to. Then you and I were finally getting somewhere and you threw that away and you didn't even tell me… I had to find out from the on again off again fling who had it out for me. "I saw you with Stella earlier. Don't move too fast. Javi will have your ass." The wheel stopped and Nixie shifted to rock the cart a bit.
"Don't… you don't have to apologize for anything." He said solemnly, sighing as she stated that he was simply being himself when he messed around with Kitty. She wasn't wrong, but it was a harsh truth he had been trying to fix in himself for years. While it was true that he and Phoenix were never dating, he should have known better. He didn't realize it at the time, but after 10 years of growth it was easy to see that Phoenix thought more of him than he realized.
Levi half-smiled as Phoenix agreed to start over with him, his body feeling the release of a weight that had been on his shoulders for decades. He noted her passive aggressive comment about Stella, but chose to ignore it. Her mention of the more exciting part of their past had his attention now.
"You know…." He could feel the alcohol take over his words again, unable to help himself.
"Speaking of making out…" He smirked, fixating his eyes on Phoenix,
"You're still the best kisser I've ever kissed." He chuckled, recalling their teenage make-out sessions in his bedroom, or at the movies, or in the forest, or in his dad's pickup truck….
"You knock those California girls out of the park, for sure." He laughed, relaxing and sliding his hand behind Nixie along the seat of the cart.
Giving Levi massive side eye as he slid his arm behind her Nixie raised an eyebrow.
"Oh really? I remembered how many girls you kissed in high school, did the number multiply like tribbles in Cali?" He was starting to push her buttons.
Start over so he'll abandon me again. Time to give him a taste of his own medicine. Tilting her head toward Levi she leveled him with an intense look.
"Every. Single. One?" Nixie drew the words out.
"Surely someone kissed better than me? I mean you were my first kiss. I didn't have the experience to stack up to Cali girls. Though Kyle was alright it was nothing to write home about. Jimmy wasn't bad but Liam was much better… he did this nibble thing." She tipped her head and pulled her hair out of the messy bun it was in. She was pulling it over her shoulder, finger combing it.
Levi’s eyes narrowed as Phoenix began to list off names he recognized; kids they grew up with in high school.
"Nope. No one better than you." He confirmed, acting as if he did not care about the other people she had kissed. It wasn’t his right to feel jealousy, especially after whatever just happened with Stella, and yet….
Levi’s blue eyes shifted away from her as she let her hair down, purposely not wanting to stare at her beauty against the fading golden sunlight. Half because he thought he didn’t deserve it, and half because he didn’t want Phoenix to see in his eyes that he did actually care about her extracurricular activities. Despite never being exclusive, Levi had always felt that Phoenix was
his. It was toxic and he knew it, so it was never voiced in such an assertive way, but that is where Levi first began to learn how to stuff his emotions down and not let them show outwardly. Apparently, that feeling about his red-headed seductress had never quite gone away.
"Lucky guys." He mumbled, looking out at the scenery as the cart came to a stop at the top of the ferris wheel, fighting the urge to do something he’d make both of them regret by the time the ride was over.
"If only I had stayed here… we could’ve taught each other lots of things." His voice lowered, almost as if he was talking only to himself and a thought escaped through his lips. There was an absence of his usual playful and flirty tone as he spoke, eyes fixated on the sunset as he imagined what his life would’ve been like if he hadn’t made one stupid decision. Or, rather, a series of very stupid decisions. Phoenix had been good for him at one point, and she knew how to make him feel important, and loved. She had been his home back then. The home was empty now, devoid of warmth and no longer welcoming. Destroyed by a house fire that he lit himself.
Levi’s eyes found their way back to Phoenix, a little smile appearing on his lips once more.
"I missed you." With his arm behind Phoenix, Levi placed his hand on the small of her back and pulled her into a tight hug.
"A lot." His heart raced as he pressed her against his chest, glad to have her in his arms again - if only for a brief moment.
"I’m sorry." He whispered in her ear, pulling his body apart from hers in that moment and looking her dead in the eyes. With one hand he tilted her chin up towards him, his body tingling with adrenaline. He wanted to kiss her. And he nearly did, but suddenly a pang of guilt washed over him. What the fuck was he doing? He slowly pulled his hand away from her face and pulled her in for another hug instead. It was obvious he was fighting his bad habits, but Phoenix had always had that effect on him…
"Thanks for not standing me up." He whispered to her again, laughing lightly before he let her go without trying to fuck up the rest of his night this time.
Heart racing Nixie's fingers twined in her waist length hair stilled at the raw emotion that Levi was showing. She swallowed hard as he said almost under his breath that sounded remotely possessive. She wasn't afraid, no, far from it. Hearing that much emotion from Levi was as intoxicating as a bottle of rumplemintz, and twice as sexy. Thankfully he wasn't looking at her at the time so she was allowed the time to compose herself.
That line made her feel more special than all the other girls in his past. That's all she'd ever wanted. To be seen by him. Not as just a friend or as a fling but someone that he'd fully open up to emotionally. He had started then realized what he was doing and got cold feet. Though she was sure she didn't help much by trying to hold on too tightly and too long.
He pulled her into a hug and Nixie laid her head on his chest. Being short had its advantages. She'd always liked hugs and was never afraid to give them. Hearing Levi’s heart racing she blinked in surprise. Speechless as he tipped her face up to him her blue eyes widened as she thought he was going to kiss her. Time stood still for a brief moment and in between one heartbeat and the next the moment was gone. Then came the guilt and as quickly as that she was frozen out again.
"I wasn't going to be that person. Everyone deserves forgiveness at some point. Even more so if the person wronged wants to move forward. Besides, Liam did way worse to me in college and I forgave him. Why should I forgive him and not you? Why should I forgive Kitty and not you?" Nixie tilted her head quizzically, raising her eyebrow.
"Let me shoot you straight here Levi Alexander Brooks you broke my heart almost fifteen years ago. I love…d you."Nixie covered the Freudian slip quickly and went on.
"I forgive you and I'm putting it behind me. You want a fresh start, that's what we'll do. But I've changed. I'm not a little girl anymore and things change. I don't want to play games. I'm ready for more. I gave Chris my number. He's single, has a job he enjoys, and has a good reputation. He might call me. Who knows. After Liam I need a good guy. Chris might be good for me… again who knows. What I'm trying to say is I'm going to be dating. Can you handle that better than high school?""What the fuck did Liam do to you?" He snapped out of reflex, feeling a familiar anger inside ready to jump out at anyone who stepped to Nixie in the wrong way.
Levi's heart twisted as Phoenix said she love…d(?) him, suddenly putting out the fire that brewed in him towards that stick-in-the-mud Liam. Did she just… correct herself? He heard that right… right? It wasn't just the alcohol making him wishful? As his mind raced he barely heard what she was saying about Chris. The cart jarred forward to continue on its descent to the bottom and Levi impulsively moved with it, pressing himself towards Phoenix and pushing her back against the cart wall. His fingers found her chin again, tilting her face up towards him and instead of thinking twice about it this time, he passionately and hungrily kissed her. If it wasn't for the alcohol he probably would have thought better of that choice, but it was too late now.
Pulling away, he rested his forehead against hers and let his hand fall down to the nape of her neck.
"You can do whatever you want, Nix." He said softly, eyes closed still as he processed what she had said.
"I don't care, date if you want to. I'll back off if you want." He opened his eyes and looked at her now, tempted to kiss her again. He was offering her a way to "use" him whenever was convenient for her, even if it would actually hurt to watch her date others during that arrangement: he just wouldn't admit it.
"I'll be here when you want me to be this time… Just say the word."When Levi crowded Nixie suddenly she squeaked softly in surprise. She started to answer him about Liam when he kissed her. The surprised sound she made was cut short as he essentially swallowed it. The passion and hunger in the kiss was a little expected. They'd always had that kind of chemistry. The years had deepened it and just as she started to get over the shock and to respond Levi stopped.
Breathing hard with her heart pounding and eyes closed Nixie's breath mingled with Levi’s who had traces of beer on his breath.
Oh please no. Dammit! Liquid courage. Fuck! He never would have done that without it. She blushed and shivered as his hand lightly brushed her nape. Biting her lip to stay silent as he put the ball in her court. She opened her eyes and saw his intensity and it made her squirm. Which caused his hands to brush against her nape and she shivered.
Nixie's eyes were half lidded and this close there was no hiding what Levi did to her hormones. Lips swollen from his kiss and flushed with desire she cleared her throat delicately and swallowed. Smoothing the wrinkles in his shirt across his chest; where she had twisted it in her hands during the kiss she looked down.
"You been drinking?" She looked up at him.
Levi internally cringed at the question, suddenly remembering Stella and the… moment… they had. Shit! She was still out there too, drunk and without her phone! The anxiety over her wellbeing set in again, this time with a dash of shame.
"Yes." He admitted to Phoenix, a slight smile creeping onto his lips.
"I'm glad I did." He closed the gap between them and gently began kissing her neck. God it was hard to focus on finding Stella when Phoenix was right here, allowing this to happen.
"You make me nervous." He whispered to her, feeling the cart come to a stop but not fully realizing what that meant in the moment.
"Alright, alright. Get out, love birds." Derek's voice could be heard as he opened up the cart door for them to leave. Damn it. The fun ride was over…
Levi begrudgingly pulled away from her and stepped out before offering his hand to her to help her exit the shaky cart.
Nixie's head tilted back against the cart wall as Levi confirmed that he had been drinking leaving her neck vulnerable. He took advantage of the movement and his mouth on her skin kissing and talking was totally unfair. She went beet red when Derek called them out and took Levi’s hand. Letting go of his hand she began to fishtail braid her hair.
"Was Stella drinking too? How many did she have? Did you take her back to Hector? She's a severe lightweight. Like one beer and she'd be done for the night. Found that out when I took her out when she was old enough at CSU." Nixie turned full mama bear on the topic of Stella drinking. As long as Stella stuck to one beer she wouldn't go
wild child and Javi
might not kill Levi.
Talking about Stella also served to keep Nixie from pulling a 'Levi' and running away. She was not expecting him to do make-out sessions and take initiative tossing the ball in her court. She never liked dodgeball because she couldn't throw. Catch yes. Dodge yes. Throw no. So a ball in her court that she was supposed to throw back… yeah that was frightening when it came from Levi. He played dodgeball and she was playing ping pong.
This was not starting over. This was insider info that starting over he shouldn’t be allowed to use. She needed some rules. No, she needed lots of rules. The more the merrier.
"ONE beer?!" Levi exclaimed, exiting the ferris wheel platform with Nixie and completely changing his focus to finding Stella now.
"For fucks sake…" He mumbled, the panic really beginning to hit now.
"She was sucking drinks down like a pro!" He groaned, frantically searching the crowd. With the fading light the conditions for finding her were getting even worse by the second.
"I need to find her." In the distance, he could see people gathering around the central stage and Jewel Navaro began to call up participants for the date auction. Levi smirked, remembering that he had signed up his friend Brad without his knowledge.
"Maybe she will be in the crowd over there?" He looked at Phoenix, unaware that she was also one of the participants.
"What do you think?""Yeah ONE. Of course she sucks them down like water! She is extremely competitive! Honestly it's like you don't know her. And yes you need to find her. Normally I would help but I have to go on stage." Nixie pointed to Jewel and the stage. She slapped Levi sharply on the arm.
"And kissing me is not starting over! You need rules mister! We'll talk about the rules later… over the phone!" She hissed at him quietly as made her way up to the stage.
"Hey!" Levi laughed and put a hand over where she had smacked his arm, pretending her hit had really hurt him.
"You're participating?" He questioned, intrigued.
"Yeah, yeah… rules, schmules." He said nonchalantly, smirking as she began to walk off. It felt right that she was playfully hitting him again and was clearly open to his advances in the ferris wheel. It might not have felt like starting over to her, but it was for him. Starting over from right where he wanted it to start.
Feeling a phone in his pocket buzz, Levi reached out and noted Reya Parker's name flash across the screen just before it automatically went to voicemail. Oh, right. Stella! Focus! He traded out her phone for his own, finding that he had missed a text message from his friend Brad. He laughed as he read the text about finding a goat to pet. Classic Brad. Unfortunately, there was no time to join his friend, so he quickly typed a response.
'Dude, find a goat later! We have an emergency!' He sent the text and looked up at the stage in the distance, seeing people begin to step up on stage.
Stella had to be there… somewhere. Everyone was going there! Plus, how could he miss seeing Phoenix up on stage? Maybe Stella would be in the date auction too. Two birds, one stone! Brilliant!
'Have you seen Stella? Meet me at the stage ASAP! Gotta find her. Also... You're being called up on stage. Time for the date auction!' He sent the text and shoved his phone back into his pocket before jogging off into the crowd, his eyes scanning each and every face he passed to see if he could find the Serrano girl or anyone who might know where she was.
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