Why Is No One Joining My RP (General Advice Thread)

[Exit]

"It doesn't matter what you do right. People will always remember the thing you did wrong."

The cool old man that is my father.

@rebornfan320 Getting ghosted sucks and not finding any interest in what you're about is equally terrible and I know that once you've tasted them and continue to do so again and again, it's hard to remember anything else.

I don't have the time to read through ten pages of back and forth. I'm sure it's all generally the same and I already know everyone here has tried to leave you with great advice. And maybe someone has already expressed this sentiment, but I'm sorry that you've experienced what you have while trying to RP and I'm more sorry we obviously cannot help you.

This hobby is really a beautiful thing and I hope somehow, whether through a lot of self reflection or a sudden turn of 'bad luck', you get to experience it the way the rest of us do. Till then, remember the quote and keep in mind that it works both ways.

[Chuuya]

I genuinely want to help people, but only if they want to be helped. I mean, I've coded several things for people on the guild and I've always been open about helping with coding. I try to be a good GM and a good player, as well as a good person. Ofc ive made some mistakes and some people might not like me, but i genuinely try.

Tbh, the biggest frustrating thing about this is that we are all trying. When it comes to GMing we are trying, or roleplaying or even creating a community (albeit sometimes flawed). Ofc people are gonna see only the best parts. I mean, I've bragged about Descension already on here, but I'm not gonna talk about how I cancelled my RP before that despite working really hard on it because it didnt get the turnout I wanted. It's like social media, I'm only gonna brag about my accomplishments and it gives this faux idea that our work is perfect. But ir's also a bit insulting that all our hardwork is called "coasting" when all of us are trying.

@fledermaus

I don't disagree with you in the slightest. I've been holding my tongue on this matter all night, but reading along, because I have some very strong opinions of my own. There is no "helping" in this situation though. At least not this specific user. They've gone on rant after rant on the website, on the Guild Discord, and on the sidebar itself. I think it's great you want to try to help, but it's just not going to happen in this case. What IS going to help though is the advice that everyone offered in this thread tonight. And Bango is probably going to compile it into a nice guide that people can reference going forward.

So, in a sense, you did help. And I don't think you or anyone else here is just "coasting" by. Roleplaying is hard. It's been especially hard since the pandemic started. It's hard for people who work, go to school, have sick family members, have children, have pets, and/or have mental illness. I suffer from some myself and I know that plenty of my friends here do too. Most of the Roleplaying populace is going to understand that and that's why we really shouldn't waste our time trying to convince a single person. They're too far set in their ways and nothing we saw will change that.

Be proud of your work because the rest of us know exactly how hard it is to pull off a successful Roleplay.

[BangoSkank]

That might be a good idea for another thread.

Everyone post their greatest personal RPing failures.

I don't honestly remember mine because I mostly block that shit out, but I'm sure I've ghosted folks a good few times. Haven't joined several RPs I wanted to because I either couldn't come up with a good enough character or couldn't match up to the writing standard.

[Rapid Reader]

My biggest failures hinge on not getting Bork to GM all the RPs I want.

[mickilennial]

That might be a good idea for another thread.

Everyone post their greatest personal RPing failures.

I don't honestly remember mine because I mostly block that shit out, but I'm sure I've ghosted folks a good few times. Haven't joined several RPs I wanted to because I either couldn't come up with a good enough character or couldn't match up to the writing standard.

@BangoSkank

That's a long list for me, chief. There's a lot of RP and RP community failures I'm not sure I should air out. I've been in the wrong waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many times to count. See: my original point about tanking your reputation and having to rebuild it yourself through effort.

I'm a terrible person.

[fledermaus]

That might be a good idea for another thread.

Everyone post their greatest personal RPing failures.

I don't honestly remember mine because I mostly block that shit out, but I'm sure I've ghosted folks a good few times. Haven't joined several RPs I wanted to because I either couldn't come up with a good enough character or couldn't match up to the writing standard.

@BangoSkank

bet make the thread

[BangoSkank]

Yo

TGM my dude. Am I you? Are you me? Wha happun?

[mickilennial]

Yo

TGM my dude. Am I you? Are you me? Wha happun?

@BangoSkank

Many things, Bango. Many.

[Heat]

This thread has more derailed posts than most ICs have responses.

@stone

Yeah if only people put this much effort and attention into actually RPing and making RPs.



I'm just being a jerk.

0.0.

But I mean c'mon, imagine if like even a third of these people actually were this interested in actually roleplaying.

There's genuinely been some truly solid advice on here. One big thing I've noticed is to try get your RP friends to join your RPs. You can still accept randos of course but having a core, important group that you are friends with and frequently communicate with outside of the RP will go a looooooooooooooooooong way to keeping a RP alive and active. As well as drawing eyes to it. Its a lot easier to keep track of friends, there's less of a chance of them just dipping out, fucking you over, they're more willing to offer advice or ideas and less of a chance of drama too.

Of course if you don't have any friends this advice is kind of useless...

[rebornfan320]

@Click This
I wasn't warned at least to my memory of any sort of warning like at all. And like before and here, it feels like no one gets and I have to push and fight to make my side and voice known every single time it is like I have to defend myself against the “swords and pitchforks” or mob mentality as it feels like I always have to try to make my side known.

It felt like you were coming on to attack/bully on me. I just feel like I am not understood and no matter what I say it feels like I'm all alone and have to defend myself. I'm not always like this at all. I just want my fair shot is all.
Thought to give you at least my side of it.

[stone]

<Snipped quote by BangoSkank>

bet make the thread

@fledermaus

That might be a good idea for another thread.

Everyone post their greatest personal RPing failures.

I don't honestly remember mine because I mostly block that shit out, but I'm sure I've ghosted folks a good few times. Haven't joined several RPs I wanted to because I either couldn't come up with a good enough character or couldn't match up to the writing standard.

@BangoSkank

roleplayerguild.com/topics/184255-top…

y’all asked so i delivered. Feels like all i post nowadays are discussion topics anyways lmao

[Zombehs]

It's time to put the thread down and go get some sleep. Also, if you're constantly on the receiving end of these so called mobs, it might be a bit prudent to think long and hard about why you supposedly have to "defend" yourself constantly.

Then again, if you need to be told that constantly, it's not like sitting down and thinking about it will probably do much good.

[Bork Lazer]

TL;DR: This thread.

[BangoSkank]

This isn't even my final form.

[rebornfan320]

It's time to put the thread down and go get some sleep. Also, if you're constantly on the receiving end of these so called mobs, it might be a bit prudent to think long and hard about why you supposedly have to "defend" yourself constantly.

Then again, if you need to be told that constantly, it's not like sitting down and thinking about it will probably do much good.

@Zombehs

I feel I constantly have to because I feel no one gets how it feels to have multiple RP's dead in a year, having ghosters drop you at planning or when you agree to start and you do but never get a reply back. I feel I have no choice but to fight for my side to be heard and understood in contrast to being targeted and attacked all because I express frustration.

[BangoSkank]

The issue is you express and have expressed that frustration consistently for years now. We offer you advice. Sometimes you take it with appreciation, sometimes you take it but say it won't work, sometimes you don't take it at all. It's the same problem with the same advice over and over and over again. You still need to try doing the same things. You still don't want to. You still have the same complaints. We still have the same advice.

[Zombehs]

<Snipped quote by Zombehs>

I feel I constantly have to because I feel no one gets how it feels to have multiple RP's dead in a year, having ghosters drop you at planning or when you agree to start and you do but never get a reply back. I feel I have no choice but to fight for my side to be heard and understood in contrast to being targeted and attacked all because I express frustration.

@rebornfan320

You feel, you feel. Good job. Bravo. Doesn't mean they have any basis in reality.

Reality check for you. RPs die all the time. People ghost each other all the time. Starters go unanswered all the time.

You are not an unique case, and it does suck sure. Take the L and move on like a big boy, or don't. Just don't be surprised when you get "attacked" for throwing a hissy.

[rebornfan320]

<Snipped quote by rebornfan320>

You feel, you feel. Good job. Bravo. Doesn't mean they have any basis in reality.

Reality check for you. RPs die all the time. People ghost each other all the time. Starters go unanswered all the time.

You are not an unique case, and it does suck sure. Take the L and move on like a big boy, or don't. Just don't be surprised when you get "attacked" for throwing a hissy.

@Zombehs

I'm not throwing a hissy at all. From my viewpoint it sure seems like i am always being targeted for stating something different than anyone else that wants to hear my side but don't understand at all. And with the amount dead in a year i have gone through I never said I was an unique case but I feel my side needs to be looked at with unclouded hate instead of being jumped on.

[Ammokkx]

This is why I only gave it the one long attempt, people. You cannot get through to him. Even when you've gone through the same or similar, he won't listen.

[rebornfan320]

I feel no one does listen to me and is against me for not being positive or even having a different experience. I disagree with your words Ammo at least here as I feel like I need to be on the defensive and guarded or lash out because i feel like no one understands me or even gets what i feel as i feel people are trying to invalidate what I experienced and feel.