Current
I'm about to be banished for the good of the realm again. Where is the trust in this world, I ask you?
1
like
7 mos ago
I'm sorry, you've reached his personal secretary, Department of Shrubbery, Floor 64, Desk 1024. How can we help you today?
8 mos ago
Or buy a van or a used rental truck. Something nobody would look twice at. You can put in a rack for the rope, duct tape, plastic sheeting, shovels....
8 mos ago
Never trust a car salesman - especially a used car salesman. Have a buddy park across the street and see how many stuffed body bags you can shove in there. Gotta have room for plastic sheeting, etc.
1
like
9 mos ago
Neil Gaiman wrote in his Good Omens bio that he likes it when fans send him $50. (He read Terry Pratchett's bio and figured it wouldn't hurt.)
Bio
I am a seven-foot tall minecraft-playing hindu guru drag-queen alien.
Possessor of an Ancient Device™ Model 17. No, I don't know what it does. No, you can't play with it.
Pronouns: It. As in: "What is it? What does it want? Why is it here? Oh my god, it's got my... <insert random body part or object here>"
Likes: World Domination, Writing, Rpg, scifi/fantasy, anime, sketchup 3d models, and anime music videos.
Companions: a host of characters from other games, my personal muse Penny (as in Bad), and the Badger gang - Toothpick, Buttons, Shark, and Mongo. They grew up in the balcony of an old theatre that played a lot of gangster movies. Normally benign, but may invade the OOC forums.
Poor little Minami... She can't even get noticed enough to be put into a list of death-compilations... She turly is the most forgettable, huh~?
Sorry! It's hard to pick everyone out. Still, she's an office worker and declared for Drasil. Does he have a kingdom needing bureaucrats? Still a bit random.
Bank Loan Officer - Three car pileup because of a teenager on a cell phone - GM's choice Pirate - Drowned - Unknown Customer Service Representative - car accident caused by a drunk driver - Unknown Assassin - overly complicated random acts that ended with being run over by an ice cream truck - Drasil Sophomore college student/gamer - bled out at crime scene - Morganna It Support/Network Administrator - hit by truck-kun - Unknown College Student / Card Gamer - hit by truck in his room - Unknown
Only two have selected their deity, but the careers are mostly office workers / college students, with two high-risk jobs in both piracy and assassination. Ones more prone to sudden death.
So it looks very random, and Morganna is a soft touch unless she's got an office building somewhere that needs office professionals and interns. Or a kingdom that's about to go broke and needs outside help to get it financially sound.
FYI, everyone. You are allowed to choose which of the two gods finds/reincarnates you. Morgnna for 'light' races, and Drasil for 'dark'. So it's technically choosing your reincarnation gatcha @Zeroth XD
@Expendable My only critique here would be to maybe use a different FC. Don't bring my girl Yor into this. Haha. (This is a joke)
Also, I'd fix the sheet thing, but I'm at work pretty much all day so quick stuff like this is all I can do.
I asked Zerochan for female assassins, and got a lot of Yor.
@Expendable Well... At least it wasn't that clown from Dead Rising, who dual-wields chainsaws... And decapitated all the people on the in-mall rollercoaster... Although that probably would've been less painful than Sam's breakfast-machine-death... ^^;
Every so often there's that one bizarre, over the top accident. Figured she was due.
"If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there."
Age: 33
Appearance: This innocent woman has hooded black eyes. Her silky, straight, black hair is medium-length and is worn in a simple style. She is tall with a lean build. Her skin is lightly tanned. She has prominent cheekbones and a pointed chin. Her wardrobe is unusual and attractive, and mostly black.
Job: Freelance Assassin
Cause of Death: In a rush to get down the stairs of a parking gargage, only to get the toe of their shoe caught under the edge of anti-slip stair nosing. Sam fell half-way down a flight of stairs and through a plate glass window, landing on electrical wires that bounced her into the alley below, only to get run over by a speeding ice cream truck being driven by a guy dressed up as a clown on his way to his son's birthday party.
Her last conscious thought as she crashed through the window was, "I wish I could fly."
A kid using his phone to record his buddy doing some skateboard stunts got her crashing through the window, etc., and uploaded the clip to youtube. Nine million views, with opinions of this being a movie stunt, or one that's gone wrong. So far, seventeen scripts including this scene have been presented to Hollywood; three action movies and one cop drama in production have done a rewrite to include it.
Various world intelligence agencies have issued no comment, with a little over half of them convinced she went overboard trying to fake her own death.
Background: Grew up in the suburbs, her mom and dad fought constantly. Her mom left when Sam was twelve, leaving her and her brother there. Her dad became a drunk, so it was left to her as the oldest to manage the house.
In high school, she was a bit of a loner, working a part-time job as a sales clerk at the gas station. She'd see other kids when they got their licenses drive up, giving her that look in her shapeless sweatshirt and jeans before heading out the door, laughing. Perhaps that was why Kalee Miller decided to escalate bullying her during lunch one rainy afternoon. Snatching away the library book Sam was reading, then dropped it on the floor when she asked for it back. When Sam asked her, "Are you trying to pick a fight with me?" and Kalee answered laughingly, "What if I am, Ursela? What are you going to do about it?"
Sam punched her in the face, hard, knocking Kalee down, bleeding. She got suspended, and decided to join the Marines.
Her drill instructor noticed she was a bit more focused - and one hell of a shot at the shooting range. Out of the ordinary, Sam was psychiatrically evaluated as having a "moral flexibility." This lead her to sniper school and being lent out to an unnamed intelligence agency.
When she left the military, she tried an office job, but the pay was miserable. However, a friend of hers from the unnamed intelligence agency would reach out with some interesting offers... and the pay was good.
Then came other offers. Including one that led her to her old high school bully Kalee and her cheating CEO boyfriend. Police have it listed as a "murder-suicide." The CEO's wife tipped.
One of her friends at day job tried to set her up with a date with her brother, unfortunately on one of those nights she was scheduled to do another after-work job. She got it taken cared of quickly, but had an accident in the parking garage near the restaurant.
TBD
Appearance: TBD
Race: TBD
Deity: Drasil
Weapons/Tools: TBD (probably a fighter)
Likes: - Blades that are long, well-balanced, and sharp. - Small children and furry animals - Intimate bars with an extensive top shelf
Dislikes: - Guys that boast a lot - Bad intelligence, it can really ruin your day - Bullies
Quirks: - Likes to keep things clean and organized. - Bad chess player - Refuses to talk about bigfoot, Nessie, or aliens. (NDA)
Skills: TBD
If it will help, I've got a great goblin pic, but I'm good with anything you'd like instead.
I am a seven-foot tall minecraft-playing hindu guru drag-queen alien.
Possessor of an Ancient Device™ Model 17. No, I don't know what it does. No, you can't play with it.
Pronouns: It. As in: "What is it? What does it want? Why is it here? Oh my god, it's got my... <insert random body part or object here>"
Likes: World Domination, Writing, Rpg, scifi/fantasy, anime, sketchup 3d models, and [url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmKRgqWGrWc]anime music videos[/url].
Companions: a host of characters from other games, my personal muse Penny (as in Bad), and the Badger gang - Toothpick, Buttons, Shark, and Mongo. They grew up in the balcony of an old theatre that played a lot of gangster movies. Normally benign, but may invade the OOC forums.
<div style="white-space:pre-wrap;">I am a seven-foot tall minecraft-playing hindu guru drag-queen alien. <br><br>Possessor of an Ancient Device™ Model 17. No, I don't know what it does. No, you can't play with it.<br><br>Pronouns: It. As in: "What is it? What does it want? Why is it here? Oh my god, it's got my... <insert random body part or object here>"<br><br>Likes: World Domination, Writing, Rpg, scifi/fantasy, anime, sketchup 3d models, and <a target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener" href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmKRgqWGrWc">anime music videos</a>.<br><br>Companions: a host of characters from other games, my personal muse Penny (as in Bad), and the Badger gang - Toothpick, Buttons, Shark, and Mongo. They grew up in the balcony of an old theatre that played a lot of gangster movies. Normally benign, but may invade the OOC forums.</div>
Chronic,
TokyoPewPew,
Sky Blue,
Half Pint,
CitrusArms,
Snowdrops,
Randomness,
Bacon,
LimeTime966,
rabidbacon
