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FunnyGuy male Member

STATUS: "Wake up to reality..." 3 yrs ago
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3 yrs ago
Current "Wake up to reality..."
8 yrs ago
I saw you see me see you!
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In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay


The conditions were set! Flyers posted! Merchandise ready for sale! Stalls cleared out! And plenty of enthusiastic monster slayers were positioned and ready for their most eventful fight of the year! Today marked the day where slimes (or oozes some bumpkins called them) migrated en masse to the shore of River Port. The event occurred annually due to the migration patterns of the slimes and had historically caused immeasurable damage to the port town, leaving establishments and even homes destroyed due to the sheer number of these creatures. After years of lost revenue due to damages and business deciding to move elsewhere, the mayor of River Port at the time, Korin Dandelion, a forest fairy, fluttered into the River Fairy Kingdom to demand his townspeople be allowed to take up arms against these creatures by any means necessary! It is said he maintained flight as he argued for River Port’s call to action for five hours straight. Whether that account is true or not, Mayor Dandelion returned to his town and his people with a single declaration…

“ARE YOU READYYYY?!” A large cast-sphere placed on the boardwalk just for this very event broadcasted the lively face of a blonde-haired forest fairy sporting some snazzy eye protectors with a devilish grin on his face. There were plenty of hearty cheers but the elf lowered his shades and raised an eyebrow skeptically. “I guess the people didn’t hear me… OR PERHAPS THEY HAVEN’T SEEN ALL THAT DISTURBANCE IN THE WATERRRR! SLIME SLAYERS, ARE YOUUU READYYYY!?!?!?” The cheer that erupted was to his liking as raised his fists and shook them with vigor. “IIIIIIIIIT’S SSSLIIIIIIIME DAYYYY!!!!”

Along the boardwalk were carted stalls that were pushed out to sell all sorts of Slime Day merchandise. Toys, shirts, hats served strictly as souvenirs, but there were also useful items for sale as well. Slime Day mallets to smash slimes with, elastic Slime Day slime-catcher bags for those looking to collect slimes dead or alive, and the very popular Slime Day slime treats that were simply large throwable pieces of rock candy.

A part of the beach had been sectioned off in order to funnel the incoming slimes. It also gave others the chance to enjoy the beach (minus the water of course) without having to participate in the Slime Day festivity. Six foot tall barriers lined the shore but came around while decreasing in height so those not participating could have a clear view while also being protected. To also ensure the slimes funneled in, rock candies were scattered across the sand. This would also allow for some easy kills when certain slimes stopped to dissolve a tasty treat.

All who were participating would wait along the boardwalk until the first slime emerged from the tide. Once that moment arrived, the participants were clear to go kill slimes to their hearts’ content. Each slime killed earned a participant three amas.

All Slime Day clothing accessories - 5 amas each
Slime Day putty toy - 3 amas
Slime Day mallet - 15 amas
Slime Day elastic bag - 5 amas
Bag of five Slime Day slime treats - 1 amas per bag


Time: SLIME TIME! (10:00 a.m.)
Location: River Port Beach
Interactions: Kharne @Kazemitsu, Arn, Master of Slimes @Omni5876, and Ismael @Th3King0fChaos.
Mentions: Annya @princess


Meeting with Annya had been a bit of a bust. Kaleb was sure he had made a decent impression, but so many people had been present for breakfast, he had a hard time standing out in the large group. He tried listening in on other conversations, but most of it equated to busy talk. Initially, he was genuinely annoyed, but after a moment of thinking, it all made sense. The large group was located in its own corner within the restaurant, but it was still a public space. Talking so openly about war and humans that now had bounties would be quite foolish.

Being seemingly accepted into the fold was good enough for now, but Kaleb needed to showcase himself. When talk of Slime Day came up, he nodded thinking about how he could use the event as his chance to show his stuff. He could also put the bow and arrow to some use and make some money as well. It was a net W in his eyes and all he had to do was put in some physical effort.

Moments later

Kaleb was standing on the edge of the boardwalk, with a Slime Day mallet in hand and fire in his eyes. He found the announcer to be quite the showman who helped in hyping the young man up for the event that was about to unfold. Before slime slaying could begin, he eyed the other guys who came along from breakfast with a determined look in his eyes and a smile exuding his confidence. “You guys better make sure to stay out of my way! Feel free to take notes though!”

“THE FIRST SLIME EMERGES!!!!!” The moment the first among the many amorphous creatures arrived on the beach, the ready participants moved. “SLAY THOSE SLIIIIMES!!!!!”

Purchases: Slime Day Mallet -15 amas
In Code Vein (Closed) → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay
Also tempted to join! I have a couple of ideas in mind, but should I DM you to discuss character stuff or is it ok here??


PM
In Marvel World War M → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay

In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay

Time: Morning
Location: Aldrakh
Interactions: Myra @13org
Mentions:


After Astra's explanation of her scheme, Vrexen produced a low grunt and shook his head.

“There is something wrong with you… and this world... Too many steps to obtain what you desire with these amas.”

“Amas is what makes the world go round.”

“This world… In time, I will harness the power of amas.” He wanted to accomplish this before Greed gained a foothold in this world.

“There's the spirit.”

“And you shall harness the power of your magic. If not, you will become useless once I find my brethren native to this place. ” Astra's cool demeanor shifted into an uneasy one.

“Lord Vrexen, I will definitely consider doing that. Magic is all about mind, body, and spirit! My mind is right, my body is tight, and when it comes to spirits, I drink white!” She declared enthusiastically, regaining her upbeat mood. She gave a nod in the direction of the grumpy bald orc from the meat stall. Why can't it be easy? She waved the orc over with a grin. “Over here! Three stin- three fish-horses!”

Moments later...

Vrexen had his hands cupped and full of amas with Astra dropping one more with a great big grin. “That's all of it! Alrighty!” Astra opened up a pouch and Vrexen poured the coins into it. Before she shut the pouch, Astra removed two platinum amas from it. “Here.” She gave Vrexen one before turning to Myra. “Here. Now you two can use that little bit to get whatever in the market without having to ask me. Also, we should probably get the fuck away from the port because I'm pretty sure this orc is about to violently transport the hippocampi. So chop chop… haha chop chop. Come on let's go!” Astra ushered the two forward, back towards the market area.

12

In Marvel World War M → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay



In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay



Time: Morning
Location: In the vicinity of the Dreaded Isles
Interactions: Lizzie @Tae, Helio @princess, Nym @Helo, Tigerlily @potter, Barboda @Alivefalling, and Tesoro @Infinite Cosmos
Mentions:


“That would be me.” Captain Lizzie moved to the railing, but she made no move to go over to their ship at all. Instead, she laced her fingers together, placed her elbows on the railing, then rested her chin atop her linked hands and grinned down at the three. “However if you wish to speak to me, ye can come over here or we can stay on our proper ships and speak as we are now. Whatever ye need to discuss with me can be discussed in front of my crew.” She stood back up and gestured to her crew, glancing at all of them then back at Vellen. “And if that doesn’t work for ya then you can right fuck off.” She told him, giving him the sweetest smile as she did so.

Vellen's warm smile did not falter, in fact, he chuckled at Lizzie's words. He liked her for sure. Many captains stuttered and stammered in his presence alone, or perhaps it was the flag representing the legend that was Ardyn that struck fear in the hearts of men. Whether she knew of Ardyn or not, Vellen found Lizzie to be a bold sort.

As admirable of a quality that it was, it was also one that warranted caution.

“Fuck off? Now, for you, that would be a missed opportunity. You are definitely fuckable if I do say so myself." His expression remained welcoming despite his words being so perverse. His brother, Rellen scoffed and shook his head.

“Now what?” Rellen whispered to his brother. He might have said more but noticed the eyes peering down on them. Rellen just felt the schemes emanating from each shallow breath amongst the other crew. This was all a waste of time. We should have raised the red flag and killed all these miserable fucks. He put on a fake grin and took a step forward. “So it really is Tesoro! My brother and I almost bet on whether or not you were the captain of this ship! And there's Nym too! What an interesting crew this is. Small but I think if you cooperate with us, you'll be fine… then again”

“Can we wrap this up? Rellen, please shut up. You're not really good at talking.” Liliana finally spoke, making Rellen his haze towards her. Vellen cleared his throat to bring attention back to him.

“Captain. These waters are claimed in a sense, by Captain Ardyn Croft. He cares little of what most do while sailing these waters, but paying a tax is required…. Just think of the sea as Ardyn's brothel and your ship is a whore. You can do what you like with it, but you must pay.” A sudden riffraff that Vellen should have expected bared its face.

“I don't think we're going to get anything from them. I don't recognize half that crew.” She crinkled her nose as her eyes stopped on Barboda. She pointed right at him “And what is that guy even wearing?! Really?! A helmet and armor?! Is he trying to dehydrate or drown himself when he stumbles overboard because he can't see through those thin slits on his face?”

“A mixed bag of asshole is this crew!” A male fairy with wings that were much too small for flight.

“The war's on the mainland matey! They're looking for their knight!” A demihuman woman in the crew bellowed while several laughed.

“That's enough! This ship and its crew are our guests on these waters… Now, what say you, Captain? The tax that you'll need to pay for the month is 5,000 amas.”

In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay


Time: Morning
Location: Myriamor Bed and Breakfast
Interactions: Leaf @Helo, , Alette @princess
Mentions: Mika @Tae, Uzul @dragonpiece, Caelan @Alivefalling, Sophie @princess, Aurora @Mole, Jomari @baraquiel, Rosaria @Potter, and Nuallán @13org



So he's interested in Sophie. An odd-placed smile crept on the lips of the pixie as she got ready to give Slick the details on his potential mate. She wondered why he wanted to know about the others but quickly figured that Slick saw them as competition… or even other options! I cannot let Sophie lose Slick! Her giddy face had gone serious as she aimed to be a successful matchmaker. The small creature was wholly determined.

Despite being caught in the paws of his friend, Alette liked Slick so far even if she tried not to show it. He’d gotten her food, was heavy on the compliments, and his friend just apologized for accosting her. Still, to her he had a funny way of speaking. It reminded her of how some Orcs didn’t speak like the other races, but even compared to those greenskins, Slick’s manner of speech was different.

The stranger to Avalia wasted no time digging into his breakfast while he waited for Alette to provide information. Unfortunately, the pixie was thinking of what she should say. She had to make Sophie look really good, but not over-sell her either. Then there were the others…

“The food is excellent, but why do we still wait here? Shouldn’t we join your friends, as she, the princess, requested?” Leaf suddenly spoke up, drawing Slick’s attention as he chewed on a bacon strip. With a raised eyebrow, the frontiersman gulped down the crisp meat.

“Good question. And I can provide an even better answer.” He shoved a forkful of eggs into mouth, but continued speaking. He kept one of his cheeks full of egg so he could speak clearly with a mouthful. “The lady over there wants us to join, and we absolutely will, but we ain’t doin’ such a thing till I know who’s over there…” Slick briefly shook his head at Leaf. “Bein’ too hasty won’t do us any good. The lady may be friends with the one in the green, sure, I get that but there's still so much more we can find out before we head on over. Those folk over yonder, they ain’t friends of mine nor are they friends of yours. Remember that.” Slick went back to chewing his eggs and in the same moment, the fruit bowl was set down at the table.

“Finally! Hahahahha! It looks sooo good. And it’s all mine?”

“That’s right. But before you go and dig in…” Slick looked down at his shoulder and directly at Alette who looked back with wide eyes. The man had not shown any aggression in his features, but the way he addressed her was eerily intimidating. Like an odd mixture of charm and expectation.

“Right! Well uh… Sophie is first. She’s young, very beautiful, and nice. I could tell by the way she was staring at you that it could only be love at first sight! And I think you would like her very much! She doesn’t nag or yell, so you don’t need to worry about an annoying mate. She even makes her own delicious food… uh… strawberry coated grain crackers! She’s very easygoing and pretty. Sophie is much better than the rest! Caelan is the male sitting next to her and he doesn’t compare to you at all!”

“Is that so?”

“Yes! He’s too thin and smells of the stinky plant that makes people act silly. He tried to hold her hand today, but Sophie denied that weirdo! Good for her for saving herself for a mate like you!”

“Then there is Nuallán who is just a boring ugly elf. He has white hair so he's way too old for Sophie! And he's always looking the other old elf woman up and down. I bet they're secret mates or something which is just gross because they're so old! Ugh!”

“Oh and Jomari. That one that's smiling at the big green monster! He whines and whines and whines and whines about everything! He's so rude that even the loving and caring Sophie hates him. She won't admit it, but it is very true. She told me.”

“Rosaria. Hm. She is pretty but Sophie is much prettier. You can't tell by looks but she's a granny! She's old and…” Alette was having a harder time making Rosaria seem bad. The princess had been so kind to everyone, even Jomari. “She has… She has… the biggest ears I've ever seen! Just look at them! She might be a princess, but she's an old big eared one. She probably isn't even able to bear babies anymore unlike Sophie.” Now the pixie was pulling out all of the stops.

“Rosaria… Now why'd I think it was Rosarita?” Slick muttered to himself.

“Oh and I can't forget her. Aurora. She can't see… and it's from a disease that's contagious! If you don't want to be blind too, you should stay away from that one no matter how nice and pretty she seems!” Like Rosaria, Alette struggled with Aurora and just decided to make something up entirely so Slick would just stay away from her.

Slick had been chowing down while listening to some of the slander being told by Alette. It was interesting, but seemed more like gossip than anything. He quickly addressed Leaf who wouldn't be as biased as the little one on his shoulder

“Hey Leaf, you got some sharp senses. You pick any of that up from them since we've been here?” Slick asked while making a hand motion at the fruit bowl, signaling that Alette could go on and eat to her heart's content.




In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay

Time: Morning
Location: River Port
Interactions: Eris, “Valerie” @Tae, Kharne @Kazemitsu, Annya @princess, Saoirse @potter, Arn the Defiler @Omni5876, and Ismael @Th3King0fChaos.
Mentions:


"I also ended up running into a friend of mine! This is Kaleb and that's his friend Eris."

“Pleasure.” Kaleb simply said with a warm smile just before Eris made a comment that caused him to glance at her from the corner of his eye. It was just then that she ushered the group along. Good one… Turning his eyes forward, he made a note to ask about those bracelets that had been mentioned and even used by Kharne himself. They appeared to work the way a smartwatch did, but seemed to have some kind of hologram feature. It was definitely an interesting invention, but he’d have to wait until he was in the presence of trusted company to ask about it.

When it came to the new acquaintance, Kharne appeared to be a cool dragon dude, but Kaleb felt good first impressions were often planned… at least his were. It was your first chance to gain the confidence of another, and if you had that, plenty of opportunities fell into your lap early on.

The young man let the rest of what was said fade from his attention as he mentally prepared himself for this breakfast meeting. He’d be meeting Princess Annya, his first noble. She was upper class, likely highly educated, and also likely an alpha in her own right. A true leader. Would he keep up his act as an elf or be upfront? She was his best lead… his first lead. Got this. He gave himself an extra mental pick-me-up just as the group entered the restaurant. Kharne was first in, and though Kaleb wished he had been the frontman, he had failed to get a good look at the hologram that popped up from the bracelet. You best believe he was second though! Aware of the giant reptilian man’s tail, Kaleb made sure there was ample space between him and Kharne. All seemed well, but there was problem. A fairly big one. Fuck.

It was quite hard to look past Kharne who led the way to the table where Annya and her party gathered. He wanted to at least make a better entrance. Something that exuded strength and vigor. I guess he can just be like my curtain. Once he’s out of the way…

The moment Kharne veered off to the side, Kaleb stepped forth with his eyes finally taking in the group. Two women and two men. One, he recognized as Arn. The other three though… He thought quickly, using whatever stereotypes and prior knowledge he could grasp at. The dude is that other guy that got brought here. Ismael? Probably. Two women, one is the princess… R.B.F., short hair, cat-suit… Why those boots? Yeah that’s the sidekick for sure… Okay, Let’s get it!

“Greetings! Greetings! It’s a pleasure to finally meet you all. Arn, Ismael, Saoirse, and of course the woman I’ve been searching for, Annya.” Kaleb held a high esteem about him as he approached. He was a noble, was he not? Instead of the fish out of water that he truly was, Kaleb appeared to hold an air of comfort fitting of the fake pointed ears worn on his head. “I’m Kaleb and I’m here to let you know that I’m all in.” He said with a confident nod and a winning smile.

Shit! What was that liiiiine?! I should have fucking rehearsed this…




In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay

Time: Morning
Location: Myriamor Bed and Breakfast
Interactions: Leaf @Helo, , Alette @princess
Mentions: Mika @Tae, Uzul @dragonpiece, Caelan @Alivefalling, and Sophie @princess


Slick kept up quite a look of disapproval towards Leaf that even he himself hadn't expected. It may have been his mood being sullied by princess Mika's comments, or perhaps he wanted to hold the young man to higher standards. He didn't know a lick of anything about Leaf, but he reckoned the guy was decent at heart. Leaf's reaction to his demand to let the pixie free only made the latter clear. Through his shame and embarrassment, he moved to open up his hands as Slick requested.

The outlaw had taken a moment to glance around the room, noticing a few too many eyes still in their direction. Drawin' too much attention, Slick. More attention spells more trouble. And right on cue, the pixie came out fuming.

“How dare you, foul creature!” Alette shouted as she pointed at Leaf with exasperation. She made sure to flutter closer to Slick, her savior from being captured and subjected to the mercy of a big person. “And you have some nerve! Critter?! Pet?! FIREFLY?!?!” It was a good thing the pixie's tiny voice had a hard time carrying or there may have been a risk of getting kicked out of the establishment … More than there already was, of course.

“Whoa, easy there. I'm sure Leaf is deeply apologetic for his actions. He don't have the best eyes and didn't notice that it was a lady and not a firefly coming to our table. Right, Leaf?” H didn't even bother to await an answer as he attempted to win the pixie over and deescalate the situation. “I can take responsibility for what happened if you just calm it down some. A precious lil' thing like you don't need to get so worked up.” Slick said with honeyed words. Alette was glaring daggers through Leaf, but she exhaled while taking a seat on Slick's left shoulder. She folded her arms and crossed her legs, visibly bothered but settled.

“You speak funny, but you seem okay I think.” Slick kept getting that from a lot of folks, but it didn't seem to arouse too much suspicion.

“Well, 'okay' sounds good to me. Name's Slick. That's Leaf as I mentioned before and we're with Lady Mika over there.” Slick had decided to openly add Leaf into his group for the time being. With a bounty on one's head, he couldn't just give Leaf the whole story just yet. The young man needed a better read. Though Slick did wonder if the big man, Uzul knew of everything that was going on. The thought was fleeting as the pixie spoke directly to his ear causing him to slightly tilt his head towards her

“Slick and Leaf. My name is Alette… and I will only completely forgive you if you provide me with food.”

“It's a deal. We got eggs bacon, ham, and some juice comin' our way.”

“No no no! Absolutely no meat, Slick!” Slick sighed and nodded silently.

“Well I guess I'll just call the waitress on over.”

“I want the fruit bowl Caelan asked for.” Alette requested. She seemed to have forgotten why she had even approached Slick as filling her tiny belly took precedence. Slick scanned around for the server only to spot her bringing out his and Leaf's plates and drink. His face lit up as the food was placed in front of them, ready to finally eat breakfast.

“Here you go!” The server smiled.

“Thank you kindly, but can I request one of your uh…”

“Fruit bowl!”

“... Ah yes, one of your fruit bowls for my friend here. A real angel on my shoulder ain't she?” Slick chuckled.

“I will get that right out for her.” Slick gave his signature nod and wink before the server departed.

“So, Alette, what can you tell me about our friends over there? Start with the lovely lady if you may.” Lovely ladies always needed to be known about first. Slick then looked Leaf's way. “How's the food, Bug-catcher?” Slick smiled to show things were still good between them.


In Avalia → 3 yrs ago Forum: Casual Roleplay

Time: Morning
Location: Aldrakh
Interactions: Myra @13org
Mentions: Alaia @Alivefalling


Astra had been having what looked like an engrossing sidebar conversation with the Orc running the meat stall while she let Vrexen and Myra address each other.

“Hm?” Vrexen stared down at the meat presented to him, almost perplexed. Despite Myra's honest generosity, Vrexen showed reluctance. So used to a world where nothing was ever given and everything had the chance to be snatched from your very being. The red-faced demon could recall a time when he was once tempted by a gift. He had grasped it and held it in his clutches. Admired it and envisioned what he would do with such a thing. He could never recall what the gift was, but that mattered not. What Vrexen had held in his possession was nothing but bait that only made him prey to another.

“Ooh, looks like Myra missed you!” Astra cooed as she poked Vrexen's side which only caused him to look at Astra with a look that should have been able to kill her. What really died was her mood.

“Do not dare strike me again.”

“Sensitive much? It was a poke. Like a hard intrusive touch. So nothing to be worried about.” There was a bit more spunk in Astra's tone. “Anyway, I think you should take what Myra's offering. With a little more social development for both of you, you'll make a nice item.”

Vrexen narrowed his eyes and reluctantly took a large bite out of the offered food. The meat tasted quite well, causing him to hum in delight. Its deliciousness was the only thing that kept him from finding the whole ordeal uncomfortable. Then the trio continued towards the port while Astra continued rambling about Vrexen and Myra being in a relationship.

“You both like the same food, are nudists, and you found each other by chance... Vrexen, a demon from the Abyss, summoned to Avalia to aid a kingdom oppressed by another. And Myra, a demon who knows only of the simple pleasures of life, seeking adventure and has lost her voice by some circumstance to be later revealed! Now that would make for a good read. I could write it in a few decades from now. Write myself in as the bitchy friend that doesn't think Vrexen deserves you… Oh, or maybe I'm the mistress after one of your hearts.” Astra talked excitedly as it seemed she was happy to have the three back together.

“Astra… Who will we sell the creatures to? And what is that winged thing?” He wanted to change the subject now, but also seemed to have spotted something interesting and new.

“We're selling those smelly fish horses to the meat stall! Oh, and that's just a fairy. They're like pixies but big. Or maybe pixies are like them but small... Eh, we'll see more of them soon after we leave here.” Astra quickly answered as she referred to Alaia who was fluttering about.

“Hmm.”

“Yeah so I should have shared what I had planned, but you love killing things and I love making amas. Sometimes they go together but I work really well doing my own thing... Oh and Myra loves eating meat…” She didn't want to exclude the demoness. “Anyway, while we wait for our buyers to inspect our stock, I should probably unveil my scheme.” Astra appeared quite proud as the three finally stopped at the docked hippocampi.

“With you gone, Myra and I went to the market to sell that painting. Made some amas at a store selling all types of junk before heading to a meat stall of Myra's choosing. Now it didn't matter which meat stall she chose, Orc barbecue is always fantastic if it's not overcooked or deformed by an oddly placed hammer strike. Next, I persuaded the two Orcs working the stall to let us buy a large piece of meat with our service to advertise for them. Worked splendidly! And finally, with the extra rapport built, I struck another deal with the meat stall while you two made googly eyes upon reuniting. Pretty impressive, I do say so myself.” Astra smirked and softly rubbed the top if Myra's head like a villain that had just shared their entire diabolical endgame.

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